36 definitions by Hansonpaulsey

Noun; After taking a shit and being unaware that you are out of toilet paper, your next best option is to search in the trash can next to you for any wiping material;

usually results in using:
-paper towels used previously to clean your sink
-toilet paper used to previously clean the top of the toothpaste
-previously used stridex pads
-previously used tampons wrapped up in toilet paper
-previously used tissues used to blow your nose
-the cardboard cylinder of the recently run-out toilet paper
"After eating chipotle, Mike rushed to the bathroom in order to drop his deuce. Afterwards, he realized that he was completely out of toilet paper. He then remembered his next best option: ass trash. Mike had to refer to wiping his ass with his mother's previously used vaginal pad.
by hansonpaulsey October 25, 2009

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For a girl to let out a vaginal flatulent or "quiff" into someone's mouth while they are asleep or unaware;

also known as a "Spicy Michael" when a guy farts into someone's mouth.
"Kayla gave a snappy cassy to her ex-boyfriend after he fell asleep at the party. He woke up humiliated, scarred, and possibly the most turned off by a girl he had ever been."
by Hansonpaulsey October 14, 2009

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Noun: A house party where all the alcohol and/or other substances are supplied by the host free-of-charge.

Antonym: Freeload Party
"Hey dude, you want to hit up this party tonight? It should be sick."
"Nah man, I don't have any money for booze."
"No worries, it's a gatsby party."
"Then hell yeuh!"
by hansonpaulsey November 08, 2009

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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The act of masturbating before going to sleep;
usually done in order to fall asleep faster and more relaxed;
the "sleeping pill" drill.
"I was on a horrible sleeping schedule all summer and now that school starts tomorrow, I'll have to perform a "sleeping drill" in order to fall asleep at a decent time tonight."
by hansonpaulsey November 08, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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Noun: A person who is literally addicted to either submitting new definitions or surfing through other's slang on www.urbandictionary.com
"Hansonpaulsey is definitely an urbandictionaddict. Too bad there's no urbandictionaddicts anonymous."
by hansonpaulsey November 09, 2009

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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Noun; After taking a shit and being unaware that you are out of toilet paper, your next best option is to use a towel conveniently hung near the toilet.
"After Michael dropped a deuce, his next best option was the bowel towel hanging next to the tub."
by hansonpaulsey December 26, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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Noun: An extremely loose-lipped vagina
"My dick was practically lost in her flesh cave."
by hansonpaulsey November 09, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt