10 definitions by Danfield

Top Definition
colloquial: God awful
Thomas: "Did you see Pat's new plaid sports coat?"
Richard: "OMG, it makes my eyes cross."
Harrison: "Yes, it is gawful."
by Danfield January 14, 2007
1. a quantitative means of determining the level of gayness in an area at any given time.

2. denoting an aggregate or amount of homosexuality.
Thomas: "Jennings is wearing his assless chaps at work today."
Richard: "I did notice a definite peek in the queerage."
Harrison: "Yes, I also noticed that."

"Damn, it's like a sausage festival in this bitch. This queerage is dick."

"Patrick, you need to stop watching these damn Rachel Ray marathons."
"William, I understand that, but my gayness compels me to."
"I just can't deal with this queerage, Patrick"
"Dammit, William, then you can't deal with me or the junk in my trunk."
by Danfield January 02, 2007
Strenuously engaging one's johnson in self-stimulation, especially using a power tool.
Thomas: "Dennis said he would be doing some carpentry work this weekend."
Richard: "Personally, this worries me."
Harrison: "Yes, Dennis is likely to use the stanley front loader."
by Danfield May 10, 2008
A person or behavior that brings the concept of micro manage to its logical culmination, that is, one who subjects complete and total anal domination over someone's ass or a collective group of asses.

colloquial
What a pimp does.
THOMAS: "My retardistic boss said that not only did I forget to properly format my TPS report, but I also used the stapler incorrectly in attaching it to the memo and should begin using Rogaine to 'offset the onset of premature balding'."
RICHARD: "Wow. It sounds like you're getting ass managed."
HARRISON: "Yes, this guy is definitely an ass manager."

I have to ass manage these hoes on 21st and Lewis.
by Danfield August 15, 2006
Ass Managed Bitch
someone who is willingly under the authority of an ass manager and from this derives a sense of identity.

colloquial
one who is subject to the jurisdiction and whims of a pimp.
ho, slut, whore
THOMAS: "Did you notice how cheerfully Rudolph complied with the retardistic ravings of that Ass Manager, Stevens?"
RICHARD: "I did happen notice that."
HARRISON: "Yes, Rudolph is an A.M.B."

You ain't nothin but an A.M.B.
by Danfield August 15, 2006
v. used only in the past and past perfect tenses.

1. To administer violent sexual contact, usually to the rectum.
Samantha was expecting a quiet, romantic evening with Mitch, little did she know that she would get struck.

"Another dick move like that, and you're gonna get struck."

"Did you see the bruises on Lance's arms, Vince?"
"Oh my god, yes, Tim, he must have gotten struck last night."
by Danfield August 07, 2006
1. Colloquial abbreviation for "cock dock".

2. The act of anchoring one's unit to a person or object, especially for an extended period of time.

3. To figuratively obstruct one's flow or generally f*ck things up.
Thomas: "Did you see Evelyn from accounting last night on the corner of 48th and Weston dressed up like a ho?"
Richard: "Yes, I did notice that."
Harrison: "Boy, I'd like to c-dock that."

"William, I was quite enjoying Philip's t-funkshun until your gay ass showed up and c-docked the whole thing."
"Patrick, you are simply jealous because my gay ass is the shiznit."
by Danfield January 08, 2007
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