sacectomy
A delicate high-risk procedure rarely put into practice because of its difficulty rating. First drink three beers (no more than three, you need courage, but also your wits). Now drive to the 'patient's' house and park as close to his bedroom window as possible. The tricky part: enter the house stealthily and make your way to the 'patient's' room. Go to the window and open it. Then, with great care, tie a string snugly around the base of the 'patient's' ballsack and drop the other end out the window. Sneak out. The hard part is over. Outside, pick up the loose end of the string and go to your car. Tie the string to your rear bumper. The fun part: to wake up the 'patient,' yell something crazy like 'turkeys! Fucking turkeys everywhere!!' When the baffled patient comes to the window, step on the gas. As you peel out, yell 'thanks for your ballsack motherfucker!'
In the unlikely event that you are pulled over by a police officer and he/she wonders why you are driving half-drunk in the middle of the night with a fresh ballsack tied to a string trailing your car, just say 'I have just performed a sacectomy' and you will be immediately released.
In the unlikely event that you are pulled over by a police officer and he/she wonders why you are driving half-drunk in the middle of the night with a fresh ballsack tied to a string trailing your car, just say 'I have just performed a sacectomy' and you will be immediately released.
