maestrobater 

To conduct your penis as if you are conducting a symphony orchestra, usually to classical music.

"Don Tildone was quite the maestrobater."

"Too bad they banned the vid of him on YouTube."

"Well, it was pretty inappropriate when he ejaculated into the trombone section. Then the entire audience had to wait for fifteen minutes while he warmed up again."

maestrobater by Chuckles the angry monkey August 26, 2007

maestrobate 

Adj: The act of pretending to conduct an orchestra while classical music plays, often in a grandiose and unrealistic fashion. An iconic mimed gesture similar to the Sad Violin, Call Me, He's Drunk, et al gestures. maestrobation, maestrobator

As Stravinsky's Firebird Suite neared it's stirring climax, Jim raised his arms and began to maestrobate.

maestrobate by ExecuMutant August 30, 2006

Maestrobating

Self indulgent musical wanking.

Pleasing ones self through music.

He continued Maestrobating though no one liked the music he played at all.

Maestrobating by xtian December 2, 2005

maestrobation 

Maestrobation is the whacking off of the maestro before a concert.

Often assigned to someone from the fiddle section because of their strong and supple wrists.

"Oh Cecilia," said the maestro, "I believe it's time for some maestrobation."

"Yes, maestro," said Cecilia as she began to play his organ.

maestrobation by scodder June 21, 2010

Metrobater 

Metrobater (Noun): An individual who masturbates while on a Metro train or bus, typically one of the many homeless drug addict males in the system high on meth, fetty or heroin. See also the verb Metrobating

When the mother and her small children boarded they train they instantly noticed the metrobater in the corner seat about to finish.

Metrobater by beerdrinker247 April 8, 2023

Mastrobate

Something EVERYONE does, even if they'd die before admitting it.

There's a few possible parental reactions to seeing their kid do it.

1, (Usually mom): *Scream* "What are you doing?!"
2, (Usually dad): *Sits* "There comes a time in a person's life when they must become an adult. You put the pole in the hole, some people like hole-on-hole. But for pole-hole, when you don't want kids, put on this bit of rubber called a condom on any hole...A woman of course, man-on-man can't end in a baby. If you want a baby, you don't wear one and you put the pole in the wet, throbbing, slippery hole and let the white stuff in it a few times. She'll make noise, which means you're doing good. I'll keep explaining tomorrow."
3, (🔥Rare Drop🔥): "It's okay, everyone does it."
4, (✨️LEGENDARY!!!✨️): *Doesn't care enough to when say anything*

These are parental reactions to their kids who mastrobate

Mastrobate by Prince of the Void December 4, 2025