Derived from diddler, a goat diddler is a person who fantasizes, almost fanatically, about engaging in a sexual act(s) with the immature Capra aegagrus hircus (commonly the goat). Sexual relations with a goat is not actually necessary, thoughts alone are sufficient to be deemed a goat diddler. For obvious reasons, most goat diddlers have a background in agriculture and hail from rural areas. The stronger version: goof goat diddler (sometimes deemed Diddler 2G) is a goat diddler who has resided in an urban environment their entire life. Having no prior exposure to goats, they have developed these unnatural thoughts entirely unprovoked. Goat diddlers in general have made goat keepers everywhere feel the need to have a chaperon with them while tending to their livestock, or else they might be suspected of goat diddling while caring for their goats alone.
One of the first recorded goat diddlers, a man from the rural Canadian city Calgary, has confessed that he started fantasizing about goats sexually in his early teenage years. Convicted multiple times of goat molestation, David Hatch has since gained infamy. Being a perfect example of the sort of person who is a goat diddler, Hatch later committed one of the worst murders the city of London, Canada has ever seen.
by MrMacFister February 13, 2011