gemologist 

who deals with gemstones like diamond, emerald, ruby, sapphire.. who speaks to stones like they are babies and shine with them.

i have a friend selling nil diamonds in grand bazaar as an expert which is graduate gemologist educated in antwerpen.

gemologist by demirsecen November 24, 2021

memologist 

A professional specializing in the study of memology, an emerging science dedicated to the documentation of internet memes.

Random Pleb: "I heard you became a memologist, congrats"

Recent graduate student: "Thanks dude, I got a degree in memology, but now I'm balls deep in student debt but it doesn't matter because being a memologist is my dream job. Now I got to get back to my computer and get on with my work, being a memologist requires a lot of hard work."

memologist by Homeless Chicken May 21, 2016

urban geologist

A crack smoker; One who smokes rocks. Is often found in an inner city environment.

Urban geologists mugged me for crack money behind the liquor store.

urban geologist by Stan Smith July 19, 2005

Geologist 

Geologists are 'scientists' with an unnatural obsession with geology (rocks). Often too intelligent to do monotonous sciences like biology, chemistry, or physics, geologists devote their time to mud-worrying, volcano poking, fault finding, bouldering, dust-collecting, and high-risk colouring. One of the main difficulties in communicating with geologists is their belief that a million years is a short amount of time and their heads are harder than rocks. Consequently, such abstract concepts as "Tuesday Morning" and Lunchtime are completely beyond their comprehension.

Geologists in the movies are nothing like the real thing. For example, in a volcanic eruption, or major earthquake, no geologist is going to give a rat's ass about rescuing a dog even if it does belong to the romantic interest's children. He or she will be far more concerned about the mineralogy of the ash falling from the sky, or the viscosity of the lava flow and its movement across the substrate (which may or may not include a village).

There is a considerable, and still growing body of scientific literature that suggests that geologists are in fact the world's first alcohol-based life form.

The geologists were supplied with alchohol (a common strategy to loosen up the cast in reality TV), but the camera crew was surprised to notice that even after drinking gallons of the liquid, the geologists did not change their behavior, and continued talking in an obscure jargonized language about 'bombs', 'breccia,' and 'lahars,' none of which made for good reality TV.

Geologist by AgeTurnipseed October 6, 2009

geologist 

Highly educated individuals who eat rocks.

Geologist: Tastes like asbestos.

geologist by Laelaps February 1, 2020

financial geologist 

aka gold digger, it refers to a woman (or man) who "digs for riches" by entering into romantic relationships with ballers, doctors, and lawyers. Such an individual is more interested in your bank account, bling, status, or cocaine than you.

Girls cum to Harvard to learn how to become financial geologists.

financial geologist by Muxgasm into your Anoose May 3, 2011

geologist 

Someone who nominally studies rocks, but ACTUALLY studies how pissed, wankered, wasted, rat-arsed, or otherwise drunk they can get, especially when doing fieldwork

Geologists make the bed rock.

Which professor is it who takes a bottle of wine into the field?

Q: How was the geologists party?
A: Wild, everyone was off their faces.

geologist by tw296 November 29, 2007