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During a bowel evacuation: a supremely thick pole of excreture which has been stuck at its widest point for some seconds. Only a supreme effort of purpleface or a sudden shock will dislodge it. The fully-evacuated article rarely gets flushed away the first time and requires prodding or breaking up with a toothbrush.

The opposite of a Stalagmight, which is an evacuation article which has not yet reached the sphincter, but is threatening by already having begun to distend the abdomen.
I gave birth to a stalagtight this morning - I'm off out to buy you a new toothbrush.
by Fox In The Walls August 24, 2007
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A female subset of sensible women who are absolutely lovely. Their only problem from a male standpoint is the amount of time they spend getting ready for sexual intercourse. This phrase is commonly used by young and desperate self pleasuring teens.
- Y'alirght ben? I heard you and Jenny were getting things started last night! Tell me about it.

-Not so good man, she's a bit stalagtight.
by aobtree May 19, 2010
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