A form designed by bureaucrats to waste the time of people with useful jobs
1: I need to do this work
2: Here's 4 risk assessment forms to fill out

...days later...

1. Ok I've done that
2. You filled out the wrong ones, here are the new ones

....later still....

1. Look, just tell me what to write!
2. Have you considered that blowing you nose and getting a nosebleed should be on here
1. What? I just want to weigh some stuff that is otherwise kept in the freezer
2. You're using a freezer! Here's another risk assessment to fill out
by pseuodnymphomaniac August 26, 2015
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Risk Assessment is the statistical probability that someone will hurt you
So Britney left him and he is just now getting over it. Later Britney texted him and filled the text with hearts and emoji kisses. Homeboy better do a risk assessment before he breaks up with Ashley just to get back with Britney.
by Liberation Theology February 24, 2020
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A phrase used my twats in management.

They aren't really sure what it is, but it makes them feel like Audit would approve.
People who perform nine lense risk assessments pity people who do root cause analysis for their weakness.
Iain "I'm about to launch a 9 lense risk assessment to determine our level of compliance."
by TheGoldenGlitch September 14, 2021
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