1. An abbreviation for Michael Kelso, a character from the FOX sitcom That '70s Show.

2. An extremely dim-witted person, often male.
1. Kelso burned down the Point Place Police Academy.

2. That guy is such a kelso! He just tripped over his own feet.
by FezDork March 22, 2004
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The highest level of sexyness you can acheive .... to be a sexy beats a pwn everyone at the act of being sexy
Kelly has alot of kelso, he must be really sexy
by KelsoMojito October 11, 2007
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A nickname given to someone when they behave extremely stupidly like Michael Kelso, a character from the FOX sitcom that 70's show.
Me: " You just skipped YOURSELF on your own blunt"

You: " Really?"

Me: " Stop being such a Kelso"
by Nuggy510 May 25, 2010
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Someone with extreme stupidity powers/lack of brain.
You know you're a Kelso when you have an incident in the cafeteria which causes your friends to call you "Tater Nuts".
by EnglishCroissant January 22, 2012
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A unit of measurement used to determine the sexual willingness of a random partner. Often referred to in the context of a verb, a 'Kelso' is equivalent to a full measure. A half-Kelso would suggest that an experience has been only somewhat satisfying. Example: She sucks, but does not swallow, she is only 'Half a Kelso', She enjoys one or more digits inserted into her anus but is not a fan of full penis penetration up the pooper, she is only 'Half a Kelso'. Alternatively, if the sexual experience can be likened to a hardcore porn movie, you would use the verb to describe the situation of having gone all 'Kelso' on her ass.
What was she like? On a scale of Zero to Kelso?
by LooseCanon April 22, 2013
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Kelso the best rapper in the world. He does lit music,lit music videos,and hit lit overall. And if any girl tryna fuck with him go for it hes da best

@kelsothegoat (btw this is not the real Kelso im just a fan of him and i love him)
by MaliDaGoat April 26, 2020
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A houso suburb in the town of Bathurst, New South Wales mostly built up of houses from the 60s and 70s. Known for being derro where 75% of the suburb consists of lads, lasses, bogans, skanks, stoners, junkies, stoner junkies and junkie stoners who all tried to gain entrance to George Street but shat themselves when they were confronted by the bourgeois hicks from Windradyne and Abercrombie and therefore formed shitty opinions on the rest of the city. Driveways in Kelso can be seen sporting a late model Holden Commodore or Ford Falcon in the driveway. Also may include a stolen WRX or Lancer.

Kelsonians tend to complain about how shit their suburb is yet are prone to vandalising everything within eyesight on a regular basis and then complaining about vandalism. Bonnie Street in Kelso is pretty much the border between the bogan trash and tolerable residents who are sick and tired of every drunk yobbo cunt who kicks down their fence at 2:30am in the morning.

Kelso is considered The Bronx of Bathurst. According to the Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research of NSW the Average annual percentage change over the last 60 months in terms of crime committed in Kelso was 4.8%. Though this mostly consists of break and enters and drunken violence. If you come across an individual looking to pick a fight in Kelso, apologise and say you've been "Punching Cones" or you've been "Smashing Pingers" and they instantly believe you and leave you alone.
Oi lets go settle this at Kelso High bruh

Ey lets hit up Kelso bottle-o
by ProfessorBathurst January 13, 2016
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