Hans Moleman

A hapless character from the Simpsons, an old man who is perpetually getting killed or injured in nasty, tragic ways.

Phish: "Who here has medical marijuana?"
Hans: "I do..."
Phris: *reads prescription notes* "Whoa...you're really sick!"
Hans: "The doctors never told me that...I had to hear it from Phish."

by Peter Bradstock May 8, 2004

Hans Moleman

god of kickassedness

hans is in charge of everything that is cool and unshawish!!

by SHOVINISTS May 10, 2005

Hans Moleman

A large mole situated above the penile region that turns the female status away from the genitals, therefore receiving no oral pleasure ever in there lifetime.

Did u see that Josh Brown kid today, god he has a wopper of a hans moleman

by Mason Ward January 4, 2008