An "off-road" vehicle that will never see off-road use, because nobody wants to damage the overpriced thing. Usually found in cities, not far from gas stations, with overpriced rims. Seldom seen with more than one person or any cargo inside.
"For what that guy paid for that H2, he could have bought a sports car and at least had fun with it."
by shiznannigan May 14, 2004
Get the H2 mug.
Massive car designed by General Motors, driven exclusively by men with penis insecurities or doctors' wives. Only gets 9 mpg, so they're basically fucked when oil starts running low and/or shooting up in price.
"Jesus, gas is back to a dollar eighty-five a gallon. I can't believe I bought that stupid fucking hulk for 50k."
"At least you're in your sexual prime, man."
by John Galt's Urologist January 17, 2004
Get the H2 mug.
A really fat person that guzzles food just like a H2 hummer guzzles gas.
DAMN NIGGA, H2 over there just downed a 5 foot long hotdog!
by Max Wagner September 14, 2005
Get the H2 mug.
a large car driven by men with small
penises, or who wish to donate money
indirectly to al-Qaeda.
That guy supports terrorists, but
he couldn't send them a donation. Instead, he bought an H2.
by Jon March 19, 2004
Get the H2 mug.
The bell bottoms of the early 2000s. Kids in the future will look back at America at the turn of the century and laugh about how people in the past drove big yellow military vehicles to the movies that got 8 miles to the gallon despite incessant wars in the middle east and spiking gas prices.
(the year is 2073)
Kid (Flipping Through Textbook): Oh my god, people in the past wore these dumb ass pants called "bell bottoms." Then look! Twenty years later they drove these stupid looking H2 Hummer vehicles! Hahahahaha!
by 720mgSTEEEVE December 2, 2009
Get the H2 mug.
1. A fictional or figurative beverage that's a parody to the sports drink "G2", which is purposely consumed by haters or player haters that lives up to hating or jealous envy, especially for no reason.

2. An alternate name for a "Hummer H2"

3. An alternate name for a "blowjob" or a "dick suck".
ORIGIN: H2, to me in this case, is another form of "Haterade", like G2 is another form of "Gatorade".

EXAMPLE: Just because you don't drink Haterade, doesn't mean you won't drink a H2.
by Mr. Terrence L. Trezvant January 8, 2009
Get the H2 mug.
Hummer 2 by GM
A frekin $20 box on $30 wheels for $52000
by mmx January 17, 2004
Get the H2 mug.