My wife and I have two dogs. A beautiful, athletic boxer with a brindle coat and a puggle. The puggle is not athletic. He is severely overweight and hasn't mastered the art of shitting outside in his two years on this planet. The puggle is our Doomsday Dog. If WWIII ever kicks off and the power goes out for a long time, we won't like it but we'll eat him if necessary.
"Hey man, your dog is extraordinarily overweight."
"You mean Apocalypse? He's my Doomsday Dog. If shit hits the fan and it comes down to it we're going to eat him with bbq sauce, and hims is going to be delicious!"
The dog that goes unnoticed till you look at him and he smiles at you with his wagging tail that can make you feel instantly happier. The easy-going dog you see every day on his daily walk in the neighbourhood.
But when you look closer, he’s so much more - he’s a brilliant and loyal companion. He’s not afraid of showing his emotions and will fight off bullies for you.
At work...
Travis: "Oh man, I've got a brown dog scratching at my door, I don't think I can keep him in until lunch."
Ann: "Come on, can't you learn to take a shit BEFORE coming in to work?"
While wearing a bomber green condom you Lube a girl's butt up with Hellman's mayonnaise inline her butt cheeks with slaw then violently anally penetrated her
Oh yeah I was back behind the grocery store the other day giving this girl The back door Ballard County slaw dog.