burhanfan

A strange creature who appeared on earth approximately in the 1630's and died in 1643. His physical description is very bizarre, and has been described as having a blobbish sort of human-like body with a big head and instead of hair, random croppings of human fetuses each with a different random expression on its face popping out of his skull follicles. His very short life does not hide the fact that he made a remarkable impression on society at the time, largely due to his ability to be just really fuckin chill. It is not well known anymore, that on the fateful day of March 8th 1641, Burhanfan pwned the shit out of Santa Claus (well known at the time as a gigantic fuckass), then hit Claus' wife and 2 daughters in the shitter while Santa could do nothing but look on like the gigantic twat licker he was. Burhanfan basically owned shit. He was killed in 1643, on another fateful day in november, when he attempted to give a school of box jellyfish simultaneous dirty comanches. Although he was injected with enough toxin to kill 662 squirrels, he was still able to mutter on the brink of death: "just purgin'".

SANTA: Wurd bitch.
BURHANFAN: Someone's gonna get their dickhole smashed!
(Santa gets dickhole smashed so hard)

GIRL: Sup burhanny!
BURHANFAN: Bitch u don't call me no nickname! Now turn around, Im'a purg the shit outta ur rump!

by Fan of Burhanfan February 7, 2008