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Akwood is when a guy gets a boner for no reason in an awkward situation. Awkwood occurs especially when one is sitting down or tired, and suddenly has to go somewhere or get up. Usually, it is noticed suddenly with incredibly bad timing.

Etymology:
“wood” stems from uses such as “morning wood” to indicate a hardened phallus.
“Awk” stems from Awkward, which is a key component of awkwood.
1. I was asked to point out a city on the map in history, but i had a bad case of awkwood and refused to get up out of my seat.

2. I fell asleep in class and couldn't stand up and leave for the bell because i had awkwood.

3. My girlfriend dumped me because i had awkwood when i met her mom.
Awkwood by Dardude January 23, 2006
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When you get an erection at an awkward time.
"So I was sporting a massive awkwood next to a nun on a bus."
When you suddenly have a huge erection for no reason and you are forced into a situation where it is easily noticeable.
Although Dave was confident about his powerpoint, he refused to show it for fear of people noticing his awkwood
Awkwood by RichKingStone November 16, 2014
A word that just saying can create awkward connotations and thoughts.
"My favorite awkword is moist. Masticate is another good one."
Awkword by das dude May 7, 2007
A word that just by being said makes things awkward. A word that makes people feel uncomfortable.
Everyone is sitting quietly taking a test, when suddenly, someone yells: "DIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLDDDDDDOOOO!!!!"

The teacher's face turns crimson red with embarassment. It is silent for a full minute, then the class bursts out laughing.

Awkword.
Awkword by karatechopkid October 12, 2011

Awkworded 

An awkwardly worded sentence.
A: I did not have neither her address nor her phone number.

B: Dude those double negatives make your sentence sound awkworded.
A word that sounds like it means something very awkward but is actually pretty mundane.
Some awkwords:

Justin: Hey, can you help me with French? I can't remember all the dipthongs!
David: Sure, after I finish masticating my sandwich.
Awkword by OminousT June 15, 2009
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British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
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Literally "dirty" pronounced with a West Indian accent. Can also have a positive connotation, for example Sean Paul's album title "Dutty Rock".
"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
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korean word for madam, older woman
Ajumma wait a moment
Ajumma by aintnotinbutnice July 5, 2009
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