AP Bio 

1. The Advanced Placement course in which students learn college level Biology in hopes that they can use their 4 or 5 AP test scores for college.

2. A biology course where students are forced and rushed to read and test on every single chapter in their 55+ chapter books. They do labs too.

3. In Kansas, a course where students are told that a supernatural being designed all life and are then sent home.

(Definition 1)
"What did you get on your AP Bio?"

"A five! No introductory Bio 101 for me!"



(Definition 2)
"What did you do last night?"

"Studied for my double chapter test for AP Bio."

"You take a test on two chapters at once?"

"Every week."

"Don't you guys do labs too?"

"Every week."



(Definition 3)
"What did you guys learn in AP Bio?"

"I dunno. What Would Jesus Learn?"

AP Bio by Talono December 21, 2008

ap bio 

an AP class about biology. simple, right? some students find it easy but others find it to be absolute hell (depends on whether they have a thing for cells or not). there is a lot of stuff about cells. a lot. like a lot a lot. more than your average pleb high school biology class.

bob: "hey james, how's ap bio going for you?"

james: "i love it"

bob: "wow james you must really love cells!!"

james: "cells are the only thing i think about ms. smitherson keeps telling me that our school would not exist without cells i would say that i like math more but that's a lie ap bio has my heart and soul"

bob: "wtf is ms. smitherson doing to you guys"

james: "she tells us that heredity and protein transport are the reasons that we should love ap bio"

ap bio by skittishcatty December 9, 2022

AP bio-help

Obtaining ass on a daily basis, with the pretense of studying for AP Biology, usually with a male companion. This act is often referred to as Bio-ass and is commonly performed by a Bio-Slut.

Girl who wants ass: I believe I am failing bio, I could really use some AP bio-help! *WINK*
Boy with the available ass: No, I seem to remember that you aced the last test, but I will still make time to help you out. *WINK WINK*
Girl who wants ass: That sounds fabulous! Lets get dinner first.

AP bio-help by girls before guys December 27, 2010

Do AP Bio 

To do AP Bio is to not do AP Bio.

Dave: g2g do AP Bio

Adrian: k

Do AP Bio by Tegg Frensen September 16, 2012

Ap biology

The death wish that at some point you will inevitably regret making.

Synonym: social suicide

"Hey what classes are you taking next year?"

"Calculus, cooking, ap biology..."

"........it was nice knowing you."

Ap biology by Samtenochtitlan April 17, 2014

AP Biology

AP Biology represents a syndrome of symptoms discussed below.
It is synonymous with "the cure for procrastination."

The days leading to the test are packed with struggle, cynicism, and apathy, but with a good teacher, students can make it. They experience symptoms akin to bacterial meningitis as their brain struggles to process the sheer quantity of information. By the end of the year, however, only the willful and skillful remain.
AP Condition 5 ~ Final Month (2 chapters/day reviewed)
Ap Condition 4 ~ Final 2 Weeks (4 chapters reviewed per day)
AP Condition 3 ~ Final Week (10 chapters per day)
AP Condition 2 ~ Last 3 Days (intravenous red bull injection)
AP Condition 1 ~ AP Test Day

The day after:
At this point, students begin to feel lightheaded. Many may slip into brief periods of unconsciousness as their brain begins to populate the 200-300 petabytes of neuronal storage and memories associated with biology with new cells.
Neurons exit G0 and start dividing once more. Soon, the students will be able to remember their names, their family member's names, and for some even their address.
The subsequent years of healing and therapy will be hard, but students will always know it was worth it. None are procrastinators any longer. AP Biology has either cured them or applied Darwinian principles to their existence.

We will no longer say AP Biology is like drowning. We will say drowning is like AP Biology.
~Gregorious Maximus

*To a student that's gone into shock as his brain has run out of memory from AP Biology*
"Take a chill pill Potter."
~Gregorious Maximus

*When discussing Photosynthesis and the carbon fixation involving RuBP Carboxylase*
"Rubisco is a street term. Only gangsters call it Rubisco. To you, it is R-U-B-P Carboxylase."
~Gregorious Maximus

*When a teacher-observer from administration asks why the children are testing in the dark*
"Tell'er __REDACTED__ "
__REDACTED__ *Robotically *: "The rods within one's eyes dynamically adjust levels of phosphorylated rhodopsin which is a slow process. By shutting the lights off, we can no longer cheat but can barely see our papers."
Gregorious Maximus: "Very good. You will one day be worthy of the title 'Biologist'".

*To students whose work has failed to meet the rigorous standards of format and quality anticipated by the class*
Gregorious Maximus: "This, this is fecal matter!

*To a group of students which turned in differing data in their lab reports*
Gregorious Maximus:

*Breaks Meter Stick In Half* "You have 1 minute to tell me who's data is the most valid."
Students: *Panicking noises*

*Disclaimer: Gregorious Maximus bears no similarities to any real people. He is a transcended being representing everyone's favorite, most loved, most treasured, and hardest teacher.*

AP Biology by TheGreatDefinerOfWords December 5, 2017

AP Biology

A never-ending course of destruction and despair rendering innocent, unsuspecting students in an irreparable state of insensibility and incoherent muttering. This course is designed to produce a free and renewable source of distant cries for schools across the nation. 70% of class time is spent doing anything but biology, including but not limited to: chemistry, physics, making tables, inventing new ways to yell at computers, and, of course, math. All AP Bio students will encourage others to take the course next year, so long as they have not had class for at least 2 hours prior and it is not a lab week.

Student A: Hey, how'd your AP Biology lab go?
Student B: Not bad. I only had 10 plants die this time. I finally have one that lived!
Student A: We were only supposed to have 8 plants.
Student B: AP BIOOOO!!!

Student A: How'd you do on the immune system test.
Student B: 28!!
Student A: Niceee

AP Biology by Billy Bob Jenkins IX March 20, 2013