burning bagel

When your partner gives it to you in the ass, but they have herpes
Yo dude that sex was fire. Literally I've got a burning bagel.
by YoinkersItsMine August 08, 2019
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Finagle the bagel

Ashley: Excited for your date tonight?
Ben: Imma Blow her mind and finagle the bagel 🥯

Ashley: *whispers under breath* You never finagle my bagel....
by The AB Finagler May 03, 2019
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the polite thing to call a Jewish person
Person A: "Is it offensive to call a Jewish person a Jew?"
Person B: "No it's more polite to call them a big nose bagel eater kike kike kike greedy ass kike picking up pennies off the ground kike kike kike matza ball kike soup kosher for kike passover looking ass kike."
Person A: "Oh ok good to know"
by goofyfoog April 01, 2025
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Bagel Boy

The act of defecating into two plastic cups, taping them together, and mailing it to someone as a joke, the bagel boy is traditionally crafted with two red plastic cups that can found at local retailers such as Walmart, price chopper, ect. It is intentionally inscribed with black sharpie. displaying misleading promises of wealth, or grandeur encouraging the recipient to incise the mysterious artifact only for them to find that they have received the sarcophagus of a fat juicy log that awaits to be awakened from it's eternal slumber. It fills the nostrils of it's victim with a devastating, and fowl stench that will cause grievous, and potentially fatal harm.
Officer 1: The victim doesn't appear to have received any physical trauma, and medical records show that they were in good health.
Officer 2: Indeed, how peculiar. However, it does appear that the victim received a mysterious package prior to their untimely demise, it appears to contain an object constructed with two plastic cups, and some tape.
Officer 1: Wait, did you say two plastic cups, and some tape? My God, the bagel boy... it's real!
Officer 3: Hey guys, the lab test came back. It appears the victim consumed a beverage containing antifreeze.
Officer 1: BAGEL BOY!!!
by DavidDavisfromOzanamschool September 23, 2023
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Painted Bagel

When you're doing a girl or guy from behind and you see poop on their ass.
Yea, I hit that but she had a painted bagel.
by JustJess1987 March 09, 2022
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Toasting the bagel

When you get a cup of coffee and you’re bored so you put a bagel on top of it till you get a golden crisp several hours later.
by Dorkuss November 30, 2017
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Cream Cheese Bagel

The action of performing analingus shortly after ejaculating in one's gaping butthole
Fred: "I could really go for a Cream Cheese Bagel right now"

Roger: "I can't help you, Fred"
by VillainV3 March 19, 2016
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