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Ninja Smoke

The ability of an individual, through luck or planning, to avoid unpleasant situations, particularly those involving law enforcement or government bureaucracy. See also: American Sniper: The Autobiography of the Most Lethal Sniper in U.S. Military History by Chris Kyle, with Scott McEwen and Jim De Felice. 2012.
"Jason went to sleep early while everyone else at the party got arrested for indecent exposure. Jason has the best ninja smoke ever."
by ajeffersonk September 20, 2013
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Ninja Face

The art of using face unlock on another person's smartphone without their knowledge. Usually performed by a child from some sneaky angle while distracting the parent with other matters.
She keeps using Ninja Face on me to watch that stupid YouTube channel
by PatTheChat June 8, 2019
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nagger ninja

A human being having the power to know everything about anything. They also have supper strength. They are not able to fly because no Ninjas are able to fly, thats just crazy. They are normally found with curly hair and are full blood jewish. The way you know if you've really found a real life Nagger Ninja is by them presenting legal documentation of a black belt with their name on it. Nagger Ninjas can be very dangerous, DO NOT approch them if you are half cuban and half bosnian.
OMG, i just saw a Nagger Ninja fly!

that would be a perfect example of something crazy.
by Ninjanagger December 25, 2010
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Nipple ninja

A person who can grope a females breasts without being caught or causing conflict
by Nothunterself December 16, 2013
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Ninja Whipped

a. Being totally whipped in a relationship and having it so artfully done that you don't even know that you are being kept in line.

b. Making a comment that cuts someone down to size but in such a subtle way they don't realize it until much later.
A. "Nah dude, I don't have like a real girlfriend or anything..." "Oh yah, do you have a girl who would be extremely upset to hear you saying that?" "Um, well, yeah... I do have that and would never say it around her." "Haha dude, you are totally ninja whipped!" (Usually followed by a text or phone call that ends with the person in denial going off to do the ninja whippers bidding)

B. "Do these pants make me look fat?" No! Not at all, they look really great on you." "Oh ok, thanks" "Sure no problem, however I read in an article that the color of the shirt you have on tends to add about 15 pounds when paired with jeans like that." "Oh um, ok..." *long pause* "Haha, ninja whipped!"
by Melly Traumatic October 25, 2010
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Ninja Car

A vehicle that appears out of thin air, completely parallel to your car, the moment you start to change lane.
I tried to change lane, looked in the mirrors and everything, but as soon as I started, a ninja car suddenly WAS there and blocked me. It came from nowhere!
by FDaihatsu August 18, 2010
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Ninja Proofing

Setting up your house to ward off long term ninja infestations. It's considered impossible to keep ninjas out entirely. In fact, attempting to do so can attract their attention and just make the problem worse.

1) Coat the walls and ceilings with steel backed teflon. If the steel isn't thick enough, they can still use their claws. Make sure it's at least a 1/4 inch thick.
2) Install random rotating magnets. This makes it difficult to throw shurikens accurately.
3) Set up a DVD of old "Kung Fu" reruns in infinite reply. Warning: This may cause Seppuku incidents, which are really messy. Take my word on it. Spread plastic in front of the TV.

Avoid using pirates. I know it's tempting, but they're worse than ninjas (really loud and smelly and treasure chests are hard to find).
Bob: Where were you last weekend?
Bill: Sorry, spent all day Saturday Ninja Proofing.
by Al Benedict December 3, 2010
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