Mastur-reading

Pleasuring one's self to a novel or any form of text that doesn't involve another person. (Not to be confused with sexting)

I spotted an old man mastur-reading in the far corner of the library.

by Creepy Guy in The Library October 15, 2011

Reading

Look behind you :)

I know you're reading this. The knowing of being watched.

by Joe NOT Biden July 4, 2020

illiterate people can’t read the bible

Used when people don’t understand that something is smart/good because they lack understanding of the subject.

“Don’t worry dude, your album/movie/project isn’t bad, illiterate people can’t read the bible”

by muwtu May 3, 2020

Sled Read

/sledrēd/
Past tense of Slide Reading

When someone slides their screen on Snapchat just enough to read a person's message. This allows the message to stay on "delivered" instead of "opened". This is usually done when ignoring a person but you low key care what they had to say.

Friend: Are you texting your man again?
You: Yea but he keeps leaving me on delivered.
Friend: Damn he probably sled read your ass.

by @slvy394 May 21, 2018

Third-Reading

When one is reading a romance book and feels as though they are third-wheeling with the characters.

“Omg Rebecca I’m reading this book and I’m totally third-reading with the main ship”

by Omg Rebecca September 15, 2019

read hard

Mentally handicapped person on the censored internet

What are you doing? You are the biggest read hard I have ever seen.

by Sp1cYdRaGoN June 14, 2024

Read it to you

When somebody shows you up.....humiliates you.......makes you look dumb

That lawyer really read it to you, too bad you lost the case!

by THE GOOD WORD January 7, 2017