bro, there are squirrels in my pants!
Tell me whats makin' you jump like that!
simp, Squirrels in my pants!
Tell me whats makin' you jump like that!
simp, Squirrels in my pants!
by redsmurff March 11, 2020
Get the simpmug. Ah yes! The simp. That slippery, slimy serpent tempting girls into sleeping with him. The desperate, pathetic being that prays on the pity women bestow upon him. Perpetually celibate, the simp will do anything in an attempt to get into a girl’s pants. He showers them with gifts, praise, and attention; he leaves his infinitesimally small dignity and ego in front of any girl that be believes he has a chance with and abases himself before their will. The simp saunters in his own mind; his own fantasy where he can pretend, he is worthy of attention without needed to bribe girls to like him; in a world where being himself is enough; such an idea is foreign to the simp.
He hangs around the normal places we all do; in the library, at the coffee shop, at football games. Yet, we don’t typically see him. He slinks behind shelves, walls, and bleachers. He goes to the lake yet doesn’t put his foot in for if he did, he would drown in his own failure and ignominy.
His only tactic? Pity. By manipulating a girl, the simp, after years of hard work, has a slim chance to have “pity sex.” The simp lives for this moment. His will to live is fueled by his scummy ways. Contrary to real men, the simp uses pity to manipulate girls; us men use real emotional tactics like shame, guilt, fear of embarrassment, and social isolation in order to get girls to do what we want. These are much more sophisticated, and exponentially more effective, which is why simps aspire to be like us.
He hangs around the normal places we all do; in the library, at the coffee shop, at football games. Yet, we don’t typically see him. He slinks behind shelves, walls, and bleachers. He goes to the lake yet doesn’t put his foot in for if he did, he would drown in his own failure and ignominy.
His only tactic? Pity. By manipulating a girl, the simp, after years of hard work, has a slim chance to have “pity sex.” The simp lives for this moment. His will to live is fueled by his scummy ways. Contrary to real men, the simp uses pity to manipulate girls; us men use real emotional tactics like shame, guilt, fear of embarrassment, and social isolation in order to get girls to do what we want. These are much more sophisticated, and exponentially more effective, which is why simps aspire to be like us.
by FuckSimps June 9, 2020
Get the Simpmug. Girl: can you do my homework for me please
Vinny: of course anything for you
Me looking at the text messages: fucking simp
Vinny: of course anything for you
Me looking at the text messages: fucking simp
by Maidich May 12, 2020
Get the Simpmug. A person, usually by the name of David, who will drop to his knees and do anything at any woman's command.
by TruthspeakerSimpkiller April 3, 2020
Get the Simpmug. by themuffinmann14 April 13, 2020
Get the simpmug. Simps are mostly called morgan and can be found anywhere such as someones private account as soon as they posted a photo or first to say something to a girl in a xbox party.
by u won’t know lmao April 24, 2020
Get the Simpmug. A guy who prioritizes hanging out with girls and forgoes fraternizing with the boys in hope of getting pussy from said girls who friendzone him. Commonly associated with the name Jordan.
"Yo, Fredrick hasn't been hanging out with us. What's going on?"
"He's being a simp over some chick he met."
"He's being a simp over some chick he met."
by Jesus's Crackrocks April 8, 2020
Get the Simpmug.