Wiped my shoes on her welcome mat

When going down on a girl you vomit in your mouth and either swallow it back or spray it on her cooter.

Dude, I was going down on this chick pastor and totally wiped my shoes on her welcome mat.

by max meat July 20, 2010

Don't wipe your ass before you shit

1.An expression you use to tell a person to stop bragging who claims victory before a brawl,race,match,competiion or any other event that has yet to happen.

A)
Kevin: let's see who has the speed to make it to the finish line quicker.

Eric: Man I got this,I'm gonna murk your ass!!

Kevin: Don't wipe your ass before you shit Eric ;it's not over till is over.

B)
Eric:10 bucks I get a better grade in my physics test?

BeHa: Man you always say that but you always fail,don't wipe your ass before shit!!!!

Jack: Yo Eric you ain't beating noone shut upp!!!

Mick: Yea don't wipe your ass before shit!!!

by BeHa February 20, 2011

i just mı ̨ade you wipe your screen

A bad internet joke that sometimes fools people.

I just mı ̨ade you wipe your screen

by Twenty One Discoball Romances June 11, 2017

cock gobbler in the shitter nigger fart dick fucking ass wipe fucktard autistic fucker

a dick head guy who just fuckes shit up even when he try to be good

harry you cant do anything right, your such a cock gobbler in the shitter nigger fart dick fucking ass wipe fucktard autistic fucker

by greg.gatzz May 30, 2017

Clorox Wipes

those things everyone went crazy for in 2020 for absolutely no reason

Man A: hey dude I just got some Clorox wipes!
Man 2: YOU WHAT?!?!?!?!? GIVE ME THEM! I HAVE A GUN
Man A: what

by mrdrjohno May 4, 2021

forced wipe

when you are sitting in a bathroom stall done with your business but you still sit there because you are reading on your smartphone and someone walks in, prompting you to put your phone away and wipe your ass

Thomas: Andrew did you finish reading my email on our new research report

Andrew: Sorry, I was half way through in the can and then I had a forced wipe. I will read it later.

by highyieldjoe February 26, 2017

Ass wipe

A female version of a dumb ass; one who only thinks about themselves.

This ass wipe needs to learn some damn manners.

by Com mon Knowledge September 7, 2023