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Flab Monkey

The fat friend of your group. Often is into and collects worthless junk. Usually eats pizza for breakfast.
by Dr. KLUE October 1, 2008
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jump the monkey

When a woman returns home after a long and boring day working in a restaurant with the sole aim of getting shagged silly. Her advances lack subtlety as she just grabs at the man´s genitals demanding coitus. When faced with any resistance she jumps on the unaccommodating male and rides him into oblivion.
Nicky: Hey Amanda, do you fancy a drink after work?
Amanda: Nah, I don´t think so.
Nicky: Why not? Are you off home to jump the monkey?
Amanda: Yeah, I am fucking gagging for it.
Nicky: Crikey!!
by FurbyFuck10 November 26, 2015
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torque monkey

After the party, I took her home and let my torque monkey loose in her vagina.
by Jarhead8120 May 7, 2017
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Switch Monkey

A guy or girl that may be very attractive one day and floor-ugly the next.
I saw crazy Stacy at the bar on Wednesday and she was looking rough, then Saturday I asked for her number not even knowing it was her. That's a switch monkey for you.
by dunbfore June 23, 2010
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Girth Monkeys

Used when referring to a large set of breasts.
A: Damn dude did you see Jayce’s Girth monkeys last night?!
B: Yeah dude they were buckin!
by Giggittygiggitygoo February 9, 2019
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Temple Monkey

Noun. A racial slur relative to Porch Monkey but for people of Jewish decent.
by Benhar February 12, 2009
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monkey tilt

Used most often used at the poker table, or in reference to a poker game.

An extreme form of tilt, often caused by a series of bad beats, excessive table banter from donkeys, or otherwise shit-ass luck in a poker game. The player experiencing monkey tilt may experience one or more of the following syptoms: 1) complete and utter disregard for money (in fact, other players may even claim that the player in question "hates money") 2) frequent bluffs and all-in moves before the flop in a no-limit hold-em game 3) calling bets with complete disregard for the cards or the odds being offered 4) jumping up and down screaming "oooh oooh aah ahh" while shoving a banana down your own throat
The dude in the 2-seat is on complete fucking monkey tilt.
by Carlos CFC October 12, 2005
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