concussive narwhal syndrome

*concussive narwhal syndrome (n.) - { sydromius concussive narwhalius } the result of getting into boxing match with a narwhal and getting hit, resulting in a severe concussion. followed by narwhal syndrome which can cause the victim to rapidly turn into a narwhal and/or the following:

bruises, sores, headaches, blisters, temporary blindness, diabetes, hearing loss, concussions, acne, congestion, deepening of the voice, impairment, lung cancer, OCD, alektorophobia, Mexico, racism, fever, rapid change in skin color, stupid, brain aneurysms, ADHD, insomnia, binge eating, bipolar depression, color blindness, pregnancy, Jake from state farm, dementia, hallucinations, household object eating disorder, heart failure, t-rex disease, lactose intolerance, obesity, swelling, standing on walls, high cholesterol, claustrophobia, compulsive cannabilism, Canada, phobophobia, chronic liver failure, dyslexia, back pain, asthma, COPD, pollen allergies, corpse husband, PTSD, black plague, hysteria, carbon monoxide poisoning, genesis, rapid change in race, hanahaki disease, chronic shrinking, autism, bioterorism, couch potato syndrome, dad went to get milk disorder, death, armageddon, disbelief in narwhals, etc.

* this is not real

UPDATE on concussive narwhal syndrome study: it causes everything, you can't hide. you have it. your mom has it. your dog has it. the weed in your front yard has it.

narwhals rule over us
gabby: " yea, my dad doesn't believe in narwhals"
riley: "oh- he must have concussive narwhal syndrome"
by gawrmochiii September 14, 2022
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Second-hand concussion

when you can feel someone eases concussion
That video gave me a Second-hand concussion
by funny_Phish July 21, 2020
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concussion

1st stage of brain damage in broken bones IV
ow i have concussion
by fineti November 21, 2021
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Concussion

When you misunderstand the Harlem Shake.

Scientifically( Concussus gigantism vibratus) meaning a human earthquake due to a strong force applied to a man's testicles.
Damn, Hubert's having concussions again.
by Snoorbifflord May 14, 2019
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Pre-Concussion Shake

A mix of ingredients put together to prepare your noggin for the biggest, most fucking gigantic concussion this green world can give a person.

The ingredients of such a shake are unknown to humankind and every living species in a milky way.

Recently though, a man known as Aziz Walid Alghawas has recently found out the ingredients to the pre concussion shake and continues to keep the recipe to himself.
"Bro, did you know Aziz sponsored Conor Mcgregor with Pre-concussion shakes for the rest of his career?"

"JFK was supplied with a motherload of pre-concussion before he was...."
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Pre-concussion Shake

An unknown recipe to every living animal whether on earth or not. The recipe was uncovered by this one unicellular creature known by the name Aziz Walid Alghawas. Rumour is, the legend himself found the recipe while jacking his shit on a discord call with friends.

Rumour has it that if many people throughout history downed the pre-concussion shake, we would be a more advanced society.
"bro JFK had that shit, rumour has it the pre-concussion shake would've kicked in if he had it 30 minutes earlier"

"Abraham Lincoln missed out on that pre-concussion shake, he could've continued the legacy"

"Guy's I made a pre-concussion shake, flash bangs got nothing on me"
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bussy concussion

When the bussy gets fucked so hard you simply cannot sit or shit for a week.
The date went well but now I have a crazy bussy concussion.
by arrybo December 24, 2024
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