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John

A womanizer who calls himself an empath but does nothing to prove he knows how to put himself in someone else’s shoes. He loves doing anything he can to get attention from women regardless if he is dating one and will let them flirt with him and even flirt back just to feel something. He won’t do anything special for you and will constantly try to manipulate you and start problems and then act like the victim. He will string you along but do just enough to keep you interested in case his other options don’t work out. He also loves fetishizing goth girls (but he doesn’t want to date anyone who is anything different from the norm). He hangs around friends who will talk down on you and he will listen instead of defending you. He has lots of girl best friends who will also bash you if you’re dating him. If you guys ever have a fight, his first choice won’t be to fix things, but to ask out other girls. If you don't have the same religion as him and he loses interest he will start using that as an excuse as to why he can’t date you. He'll go on and on about how he doesn’t have any money to spend on a girlfriend but he will turn around and buy one of his girl best friends ice cream and take her out and spend money on himself. He will cheat on you multiple times and get sulky and not talk to you if you try to bring it up. He is still friends with ALL of his exes. And he loves to defend men on the internet who have done bad things. If you ever meet a John, run far far far away.
Girl: Who is that playing the guitar with all those girls around him?
Other girl: Ew, that’s John. Let’s go somewhere else
by shutupmaggie August 29, 2023
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John the soft sword

Your friend named John who has a soft sword pretty plain and simple.
JOHN THE SOFT SWORD: Your friend named John who has a soft sword pretty plain and simple. Why is your sword soft?
by GoBlueMrBrightside December 7, 2023
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pierce johns

me the awsome kid that is in the logang
by why u swallow April 20, 2018
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The John Cena

When you got one hand in her cooter and one in her tooter and you flip her over so fast she kisses her own ass.
The other night I did the John Cena on a girl and the next day she called her chiropractor.
by Muddcutie February 18, 2022
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John

John likes kids, sometimes if John is too close to a kid, that kid will never be seen again.
See that guy there, he is a John. He touches kids.
by SHIBALL November 23, 2021
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John Ray

Keep away from children. AA
Damn Thats, John Ray.!.??!
by Bobsuckedmypenis January 24, 2022
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John

John is a larger than life stoner, who thinks that anything can be solved with some ganja, anything from funerals, to childrens birthday parties you will always find john lurking around somewhere smoking a joint. He is also a surprisingly good cook, but make sure to ask what he puts in the brownies he makes you because you might just be looking at a really interesting night.
guy 1: it's so sad aunt mary passed away.
guy 2: i know what can lighten our moods, im pretty sure john's smoking a joint in the parking lot.
guy 1: oh word i heard he has that ganja
by thickzwick January 23, 2020
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