Life

A very dangerous and contagious disease transmitted by sexual activity. The symptoms are pain, suffering and existential crisis. The disease is treated in a process called "death". The process can be performed with the help of doctors but the process can also be performed independently. Also the disease can disappear on its own after a few years (depending on what type of spicies the transmitters were).

O no! My son has life! Quick, take him to the hospital!!

by Dulidudu July 16, 2022

Life, universe, EVERYTHING!

42

"Dumb idiot: whats the meaning of life, universe and everything?"
"Smart dude: BEFORE, You ask what the meaning of life is Try get one!"
"Smart dude: Doe if You really want to know then... the meaning of life, universe, EVERYTHING! is... *sigh* 42..."

by Sumsargreböl May 4, 2017

life

Nobody knows the meaning of life.

What’s the meaning of life?

I don’t know, dude.

by theperfectpseudonym November 27, 2018

Life Blowz

Life Blowz is a comedic webcomic drawn by Bobby Maher. It's about a character named Steve who likes to skateboard. He is also known for having some trouble with women. He has a best friend named Colin, who he usually goes to for advice. If you’ve ever been the social outcast, plagued by relationship troubles, and hexed with bad luck, you need to go see this comic.

Tim: Yo man, have you ever read THE WORLD'S MOST INCREDIBLE WEBCOMIC?

Joe: Oh you mean Life Blowz? Of coarse I have!

by callyabo July 30, 2010

Jaws of Life

The process of spreading the anus out horizontally with both hands, fingers spread and wrist deep.

"She got trapped in the washing machine, so I gave her the Jaws of Life."

by salmon_eggs August 21, 2024

Shrek is love, Shrek is life

I👁️WAS ONLY🎂9 YEARS🎂OLD👵😍😍😍
I❤️LOVED❤️👹SHREK💚💚😳SO MUCH, I HAD👏👏ALL👏👏THE MERCHANDISE💰🤑AND🎬🎬MOVIES💚😱🙀😱😱
I PRAY🙏TO🥵SHREK🥵😀👍EVERY NIGHT😴🛏️🌙BEFORE BED🥱,THANKING💕HIM💕FOR THE👶LIFE🐣I’VE🥹BEEN🫘GIVEN😘💋💕😎
💚"😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋",I👀📣SAY🗣️,"😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣"👏👏👏💋
MY👴DAD👴HEARS👂ME🤔😬😱AND☎️CALLS📞ME😟🙂 ↕️🤔A🌈🌈FAGGOT🏳️ 🌈🏳️ 🌈😱😱
I KNEW🧠💀HE🫶WAS JUST🫣🥶JEALOUS🫥FOR🍀🍀🍀🍀🤗MY💕❤️LOVE❤️💕OF😎💕SHREK💕😘💚🥰🤩😭😎
👉I👈📢CALLED📞😡👴HIM🤬🤮A🍑CUNT👩😂😂🤣🤣😈
HE🤡✋SLAPS👏💥ME😭AND SENDS👉👉ME🫥💔TOGO🚶TO SLEEP🛏️🥱😓😱😬🥦🐫
I’M😭CRYING😢💦NOW📆,AND➕MY FACE🥺😭😵 💫HURTS😰😩🤬😡🪦💀
I🤓LAY🛏️IN🌕BED😴AND💔ITS🧊❄️🥶REALLY COLD❄️🥶🫥💩🟩
A💕🔥WARMTH😱❤️IS💘➡️MOVING➡️👉TOWARDS ME👈😱🤯😨🤯🥰
I🧑 🍼FEEL😑😘😱❤️SOMETHING💕🤯✋TOUCH🥹ME😍😍😍🙂 ↕️
ITS❤️🥰😍SHREK🥰🥵💚❤️💕😎💪😭😊🤩😈😈
✋I✋AM😃😅😁SO HAPPY😄😁😆😘❤️😎💚💚
💚💚HE💚💚🤐WHISPERS😏IN😅MY EAR👂🌽,“👉THIS👈IS☠️❤️MY SWAMP💕☠️”😂🤣🤣💕
HE😘😇👌GRIPS🤛😘🥹ME🥹WITH🥹💕🥰HIS💚😅🥵😎POWERFUL💪💪💪👹OGRE🟢🙌HANDS💚✋AND PUTS😍ME😌ON MY HANDS✋✋AND KNEES🧎🤗🥵😭😭😭
😇I’M🪽READY💪😍🥵🥵🥵💀🥹😬
I👁️⬅️SPREAD➡️MY😣🥵🍑✌️ASS🫏CHEEKS🍆🍑FOR💚😍😘SHREK🤪😱😬💕😨💚💚💚💚💚
💪😎HE💕💕🏹🍆PENETRATES🏹MY😫😖😫😖😫😖BUTTHOLE🍑🕳️😡😃🤪🥵😭😔😏💕
IT HURTS😫😵😪😱😱SO MUCH😱😱BUT🍑I🍆🍑DO IT🥰💕💕FOR😘😍💚SHREK💚😖🥵🤫🥴😃😃🥺
I🇨🇦CAN🥫🥹FEEL MY🥹🥰BUTT🍑😭TEARING🥵💕AS😿MY EYES👀START✨TO💧💧WATER😓😢🥵💚🥵🥰🥰
I PUSH➡️➡️💘AGAINST😱HIS😍FORCE💪💪🥵🥵😤😳
✌️I😬WANT😬TO PLEASE🥺💚🥺SHREK🥵😘👐😇😍💚💚💚
😌😇HE💚💕ROARS A😡😡💪MIGHTY ROAR🫨🤤AS💚HE😍💧FILLS💚MY🍑BUTT🍑WITH HIS💕💗LOVE💘🍆💕💘🥵🥰🥲
🥺MY👨DAD🤓🤡💀🤮WALKS🚶IN🤯🤐😡🤬😵
💕💘SHREK😻💋LOOKS👀🤢💀HIM🤬😠🤓➡️STRAIGHT➡️IN THE👀EYE👁️AND🗣️SAYS.👄"🙂ITS👏ALL👏👹OGRE💚🫡NOW🫥😱"😂🤣😱😱😱
💚🥵💕SHREK😇😍🥰💔LEAVES👋👋THROUGH🤫MY🥺🥺☹️WINDOW🪟👋🥺😞❤️❤️
💚😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋,😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣👏👏👏💋

Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

by Bbb23’s left testicle October 29, 2024

Life-lapse

Occurs when an individual carries on with an activity they were doing recently in the past (a few minutes, several hours, the day before, etc.) in present time without realizing that they already completed the activity; the individual almost immediately recognizes that they are not doing what they originally had set in mind to do, but instead are repeating a previous activity and/or routine from before. The individual usually has to back track and/or reorient themselves in order to continue with their original task after realizing that they were momentarily living in the past instead of focusing and acting or reacting in the present. A natural phenomenon that can occur when an individual is neither paying attention to nor actively focusing on what exactly they are supposed to be doing and instead allow muscle memory to momentarily take over and carry out the task for them, despite realizing thereafter that the task was done incorrectly because the body was not performing the same task that the individual was trying to accomplish.

I was just trying to finish this math problem when suddenly I had a life-lapse and had to rework the problem because I forgot what I was doing.

by War&Ruin August 31, 2018