When a man is very certain that he's getting a sexual opportunity, but is unable and/or unwilling to wash off his manhood beforehand. His penis is a 'salty simon'.
I hate that she makes me work so hard for a bit of loving. To balance things out a bit, I'm going to present her with a salty simon.
by franc black May 5, 2013
Get the salty simonmug. A cocktail consisting of 1-2 excedrins and a shot of whiskey, usually had during a pre-game before a big night out.
Person #1: Tonight's a big night. We need to start on the right foot.
Person #2: Let's have a Simple Simon
Person #2: Let's have a Simple Simon
by The Real John Lennon January 30, 2015
Get the Simple Simonmug. by THEJKR May 28, 2014
Get the connor simonmug. 
Literally the hottest character in Fear Street: 1994 who also happens to be my boyfriend. We act as if he didn't die :)
Random citizen: "Woah! Who is that hot man sitting next to you?"
Me: "Oh, that's my lovely boyfriend Simon Kalivoda "
Me: "Oh, that's my lovely boyfriend Simon Kalivoda "
by Sim0nKaliv0dasGF April 27, 2022
Get the Simon Kalivodamug. A simon is the best person you could ever meet in your life. They will always be there when you need them and make you feel like you have a meaning. They tend to have a circular face shape, brown/black hair, and the most perfect smile. They are caring, sweet, kind, smart, and just amazing in every single aspect. A simon will always check up on you and make sure you're doing okay, if not then they will do anything in their power to make sure that you are. Even if you meet a simon at a young age, they will prove to you that they're going to be an amazing father and take special care of your guys kids. They always want to help people even if they dont know them and that's one of the best things about them. Meeting a simon is one of the best things that will ever happen to you, they will treat you like a queen and tell you how amazing you are every day. Simon is the bestest bestfriend you could ever ask for. They are also an amazing significant other and will show how much you mean to them 25/8. They tend to care about everything and everyone. If you ever meet a simon never let them go because even though things might not be the best as of right now, they will always be there and never leave your side.
Person 1: Did you hear that I got with simon sanchez?
Person 2: Who's that?
Person 1: The person who changed me for the best.
Person 2: Who's that?
Person 1: The person who changed me for the best.
by Stinky chicken nugget April 18, 2021
Get the simon sanchezmug. Simons law was created by Simon Roberts (me)
And is that every combination of letters that isn’t a word is a number as there are a limited amount of words and an unlimited amount of numbers so numbers has to take every space of every available combinations. This means that “gshvsvsbeiaoqowibshwiaoxjsbsbixSjjwbwjdjnsbuxjebshixdnebebebebebsbsusjjsbsbdjxidosplwbbrbridoxnwbwjaosixjbebsjdjdhcbkeowoakdbbdjdisbsndbdbdbdbdbdbidjsnsbdbdbbdhdhdiw“ is a number just like one or one hundred or a billion but wayyyyyyyy past the highest number that we know of (googolplex) (10^1(100 zeros) this means that numbers over a googolplex that haven’t been invented are free to make so... GO HAM
And is that every combination of letters that isn’t a word is a number as there are a limited amount of words and an unlimited amount of numbers so numbers has to take every space of every available combinations. This means that “gshvsvsbeiaoqowibshwiaoxjsbsbixSjjwbwjdjnsbuxjebshixdnebebebebebsbsusjjsbsbdjxidosplwbbrbridoxnwbwjaosixjbebsjdjdhcbkeowoakdbbdjdisbsndbdbdbdbdbdbidjsnsbdbdbbdhdhdiw“ is a number just like one or one hundred or a billion but wayyyyyyyy past the highest number that we know of (googolplex) (10^1(100 zeros) this means that numbers over a googolplex that haven’t been invented are free to make so... GO HAM
by DeepppppmannnnnnnnSimon January 12, 2021
Get the Simon’s lawmug.