Do you want Oklahoma but with no lakes and ten times as fucking boring? Missouri is right there. Crackheads, drugs, abandoned buildings? We have it all. Wanna shoot up? Ask your neighbor for some heroin! Here at missouri well give you whatever you want if you got a gun pointed towards our head! Well except the rednecks they get a little feisty if you walk across there house. Also perfect for kidnappings! Cops don’t give a shit here in Missouri! Ever wanted all your shit robbed? Welcome to Missouri we’re there’s a pedophile and criminal in every half a mile radius!
Guy 1: Let’s move to Missouri!
Guy 2: I’ve always wanted to smoke laced weed at a kum & go parking lot. Let’s go!
Guy 2: I’ve always wanted to smoke laced weed at a kum & go parking lot. Let’s go!
by The druggy across the stree June 28, 2022
When andy was 20 he had sex wiyh arleen who was 14, but he shockingly didn't get arrested, cuz in missouri when you're younger than 21, you can have sex with someone down to 14, but when you're 21, the younger person has to be 21.
by Sam d. May 27, 2020
The act of the woman or man laying faceup with their mouth full of dry Koolaid mix. While a man squats over him/her mouth reverse cowgirl direction dunking his nuts in the colorful mix and releasing a simultaneous fart right above their nose. Causing her to have a coughing fit and release clouds of colorful dust while you run away.
by mydogtheasshole September 03, 2021
it involves 2 men and 1 orphan girl the guy is sitting there fucking the girl and the other slides in to the dm‘s and and propels homies dick with the power of a 1000 cannons into the orphan throat and when the dude fucking the orphan nuts the semen is propelled out of the orphans ass and that is the missouri jack hammer
did you hear about that dude robert do the missouri jack hammer on his cousin his cousin was sore for weeks
by oh s d kill January 22, 2020
by Qwertyioppasdf January 23, 2024
Hidden in the corner of nemo, borderlands of iowa, and missouri lives a man; to some maybe a legend, local stallion and the "gangster of missouri"
by Lionheartgypsysoul August 02, 2024
The Missouri Tandem usually works best for threesomes of 2 men and one woman. One uses the vagina, whilst the other uses the anus. When the female is on the edge of orgasming, both the men suddenly pull out and flip her over, so the man who was penetrating her vagina is now penetrating her anus, and vice versa.
Bandit and I were giving Emily a good romp. When she got close, we gave her a Missouri Tandem! Good times.
by Weird Furry Fucker March 02, 2021