turtle wax

A term used to describe someone who waxes, or appears to wax, their pubic hair.

It's as smooth as a tortoise's shell down there - I just got me a turtle wax!

by Jazzual December 18, 2012

turtlestach

inserting the finger in the anus and smearing reminates upon the upperlip of a bud, also called a hittler.

Doug kicked Steve's ass for giving him a turtlestach lastnight.

by naughty noel June 20, 2009

turtle wax

The act of ejaculating in someone's helmet while it is left unattended, then getting them to place it on their head. A practical joke particular to the military.

Joe left his helmet in the truck so I rubbed one out in it then he put it on, it was the perfect turtle wax.

by Aco FIST October 22, 2013

Turtle Flower

Tis Cabbages.

A:hmm .... you like turtle flowers?
B: what are those
A: cabbages
B:What the fuck are you talking about, we are in the middle of a hearthsurgery... snap out of it.

by SneakySorrow August 20, 2021

turtledumplin

A turtledumplin is someone that is someone that uses Twitter and is nice to people on the timeline and in their DM rooms, but is actually talking shit about everyone behind their backs

Linda is always talking about people behind their backs; she's such a turtledumplin

by CassieWin February 9, 2023

Swiss Turtleneck

The act of a man's head being placed between two sets of large breasts so that the breasts form a "turtleneck" around the man's neck.

Brandon: "Dude, i got the two Emily's to give me a Swiss Turtleneck!"

Blake: "Nice!"

by Big Choctaw July 9, 2010

get turtle

attempting to secretly grab, nudge, or poke a man's penis while he is not looking. This is typically done as sexual flirting or provocation, and is not to be confused with a "dick check" that frat brothers typically distribute as a joke to inflict pain.

While we were at the Pride Parade, this guy came up and rubbed Eddie's leg. He was totally trying to get turtle.

by Padge1982 September 7, 2010