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Roon’s law

The person who names a thing is often more powerful than the original discoverer
"You hear about Roon’s law?”

"Yah man but funny thing. It was made by this guy called Andrew Reed"
by Martian bot December 26, 2021
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Jake Piper's fourth law

The last of his laws, it states:
There can only be three laws.

The law is a certified law.
Connor: "Hey man, I used Jake Piper's fifth law here and-"
Daniel: "Come on man, use Jake Piper's fourth law. There's no fifth law"
by unitybacon October 13, 2020
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Milton's Law

Milton's Law
"Anything that can go wrong will go wrong, but only when Milton is watching."

Explanation:
Milton's Law posits that the presence of an observer named Milton—or someone who embodies Milton's unlucky aura—dramatically increases the probability of failure in any given scenario. This law suggests that even events with a low likelihood of error are susceptible to catastrophic outcomes when under Milton's watchful gaze.

Corollary to Murphy’s Law: While Murphy’s Law predicts failure as a general inevitability, Milton’s Law suggests failure is conditional, triggered specifically by Milton’s presence.
Applications:

1. Psychological Influence: Individuals may experience heightened anxiety or pressure when being observed, particularly by Milton, exacerbating the likelihood of mistakes.

2. Statistical Anomalies: Systems, machines, or processes appear to fail at an unreasonably high rate when Milton is nearby, regardless of prior reliability.

3. Practical Implications: Milton's Law serves as a humorous yet cautionary reminder of human fallibility under scrutiny. It is invoked to explain unexpected failures in otherwise routine tasks.
by Rampy9798 January 28, 2025
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towel law

The unspoken rule that towels' rights are less than any other person's, excluding towels themselves. Towels are not allowed to:
1. Read
2. Write
3. Vote
4. Drive
5. Leave their designated area
6. Dry anything their masters say not to
7. Disobey a master's orders
8. Smoke, drink, or have other substance-related activity
Towels are subhuman filth.
Thanks to Towel Law, the towel was punished sternly by the whip for attempting to write a book about how to drive, against Amy Schumer's vagina's wishes. It was quickly rolled into a makeshift dildo-tampon and shoved back in. Amy Schumer stopped menstruating a long time ago, so don't worry. It's just super sweaty and gross.
by Niger Tits October 9, 2017
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the law of BtH

The natural law that states that when a certain person from a non-disclosed Western-European country introduces two or more people to eachother, they will always immediatly gang up on the person that introduced them. It does not matter whether these people knew eachother before or how long they knew the introducer already. Scientist are still researching the exact cause of this law.
Kyle #1: you know, I kinda feel bad for him. Why do we always bully him again?
Kyle #2: because of the law of BtH
by sint-kathelijne-waver March 10, 2022
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The Karamazov law

The real state of a relationship is inversly proportional tot the projected state of the relationship on social media.
Becky and Jake look so cute on instagram, but, they totally live according to the karamazov law, they hate eachother.
by TheDankBoisin1080p January 7, 2021
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Shar-yee-haw Law

A set oppressive laws placed upon citizens due to the bigotry and close-mindedness of organized religion. But in Texas.
"Our country is being taken over by Muslims! Its going to be under Sharia Law!"
"OK, but look at Texas. It's already under Shar-yee-haw Law with its evangelical Christian population making laws controlling other people's bodies".
by Gabagools June 2, 2022
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