minstrel cramps

Da assorted painful muscle-spasms dat you suffer from excessive musical-instrument playing, or from lugging around a lute or lyre dat's too heavy/bulky.

While Jaime Sommers was under hospital-room arrest, Steve Austin sneaked up to her window and eye-twinklingly said dat he had "come to serenade her". Da unjustly-detained-and-therefore-very-downcast Jaime then asked Steve if he knew da song called "Melancholy Baby", but of course, he had actually gone there just to bionically bust her out of her room so dat she could travel wif him to investigate her supposed crimes for themselves and try to figure out what had happened in reality and who had truly been responsible, and so there was no risk of Steve's actually developing any minstrel cramps, since he never ended up strumming a note on any stringed instruments.

by QuacksO June 18, 2023

Lover's Cramp

The uncomfortable, and sometimes painful, seizing up of the muscles in the hand and forearm caused by excessive stimulation of another's or one's own genitals, normally from rubbing, stroking, or fingering.

"Man, I spent so long fingering my girl last night that I've developed Lover's Cramp"

"Sorry, I can't play the guitar today, I've got Lover's Cramp"

by Bubert Samson May 1, 2013

Pen Cramp

A pain in your fingers after using a pen. Can be caused by either writing or drawing, (as well as other pen uses). Similar to Writer's Cramp.

OW FUCK I THINK IVE GOT PEN CRAMP
no -no guys its not wanker's cramp, Ive been drawing for the past hour and a half

by Comic_27 January 16, 2021

jackers cramp

When an individual gets a cramp in one arm from excessive masturbation.

Tom: dad my arm really hurts.
Tom's dad: hmm must be jackers cramp
Tom: www shut up dad! You're embarrassing me I don't do that!
Jacking off masturbation

by Pirotek March 19, 2017

Texan Cramp

A bullet wound.

Man 1: “What’s wrong with him?”
Man 2: “He’s got a Texan Cramp.”
Man 1: “Ahh, I’ll get the tourniquet.”

by Meat_Whistle February 26, 2023