no family rule

The No Family Rule is a clearly defined standard in joke telling. Passed down generation by generation from our forefathers who developed the oral story telling tradition after many an altercation resulted from poorly delivered witticisms. The rule states that “no person may, at the expense of a handicapped and/or health impaired third party, pass any humorous remark where such humour stems from said handicap and/or health impairment UNLESS the deliveror has a family member (no more than once removed) with that same handicap and/or health impairment”.

Dude, Jimmy just dropped a AIDS joke and I know for a fact he's got no family with the "slow puncture". Clear breach of the No Family Rule... uncool.

by ConcernedThirdParty October 21, 2013

Monday Rule

The rule stipulating that no one in your circle of friends with whom you typically discuss Game of Thrones episodes in can speak of, or even allude to, the latest episode until Monday. This is critical in order for the episode to be posted online for those without HBO.

"Bro, that last episode of Game of Thrones was nuts. So many people died."
"Shut up! Monday Rule!"

by RIFF January 22, 2014

The Jess Rule

Under the Jess Rule, when another person has a yummy or interesting looking drink, you can request a taste and the other person is forced to share.

The Jess Rule is requesting a taste of your mates drink.

*Person looks at drink* That drink looks yummy, Jess Rule!!!!

by Drinking buddy November 28, 2017

Creep Rule

A person's a creep if the age difference between them and their date is greater than half the eldest's current age, plus 7. For example, if a guy is 30, the youngest person he can date without being considered a creep is 15+7=22; younger than that, society looks at the couple sideways.

Dude, you're 45 and dating a 20 year-old? You're a creep!!!! Creep rule is half-your age + 7, my friend. You should date my cousin instead, she's 30 and a freak in bed.

by Caramirdan October 3, 2016

Ponky rules

Slogan where everyone in the neighborhood looks after one another/ has another's back. Ponky is an abbreviation for Ponkapoag, a suburban neighborhood in Canton, MA outside of Boston, MA. Lots of parties, fun, #ponkahooplah

Police: Why won't you reveal who did it?
Me: Because Ponky rules.

by Ghhoste July 29, 2017

McGuns Rule

When it absolutely positively needs to be shotgunned, you call...the Mcgun's Rule, developed during the manhatten project, it was a direct answer from the germans counter to the shotgun, the blitzkreig. The Americans knowing that their only hope to win the spirits of America back, developed the ultimate "shotgun" which cannot be overturned. The Mcguns Rule is only to be used sparingly and for dire need circumstances, when you must have something. It is the older brother of the Atom Bomb, developed 1 month before it because America knew what it would take to win the war, and much like the Atom Bomb it destroys everything in it's path. To this day, many still consider it to be similar in power to Ryus Hyduken, Raidens spear, or the BFG 9000. Basically it fucks shit up in a way that the people of Hiroshima are thankful they ONLY got the bomb and not the rule that shits on their laughable sho gun rule.

After the geneva convention, many humanitariums stressed to have it revised and include banning the Mcguns Rule, Uncle Sam politely said Fuck You.

Order of Command
Dibs, Shot, Sho Gun, Shotgun, Shotty, Blitzkrieg, MCGUNS RULE

Dan: Fuck I just broke my Leg
Dante: Alright dan get in the truck
Steve:McGuns Rule!!!!!!!

Lanolin: I've been having bad luck with the lady's since that boric acid hit my face, hey theres a slut who will have sex with me as long as I put her down...MCGUNS RULE!!!

by Bukkake Buffet August 27, 2009

Roman rules

When a bro wants to fuck his bro but it's not gay, he just appreciates him as a male specimen

Hey bro. Roman rules right?

by jebatz June 17, 2020