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lullaby and a handjob

When a strange woman sings "Killing me Softly" in a man's ear whilst proceeding to wank him off like the clappers forcing him to simultaneously experience a cum explosion or a very severe cum clot and fall into a traumatic deep sleep from which he may never wake.
Jenny gave Jack the best "Lullaby and a handjob" the other night after losing a hand at dingleberry circus roll along. Now he will sleep for weeks without any gambling worries.
by Baitconversation906 January 27, 2017
mugGet the lullaby and a handjobmug.

floss handjob

Attempting to do the dance known as the "floss" whilst giving a handjob.

WARNING: dick yanking is inevitable.
Side Affects may include: needing a dick transplant, or needing your dick reattached.
ER nurse: What are you in for?
Dude: I'd rather not say..
ER nurse: Then I can't help you.
Dude: My girlfriend tried giving me a floss handjob, and it really hurts!
by sweden2020 April 27, 2021
mugGet the floss handjobmug.

Chubby handjob

A guy who isn’t cute enough to have sex with whether it’s because he smells bad, or is weird, or both, BUT is cute enough to give a fat handjob to.
Sasha: See that guy over there? Would you let him hit?? 👀
Jules: Nah he’s honestly a chubby handjob
by brilliantbimbo69 June 25, 2021
mugGet the Chubby handjobmug.

Hersheys Handjob

When a chick defecates in her and then proceeds to work your dick until you ejaculate into her shitty palms.
Holy shit man, Tammy was so drunk last night that she gave me a Hersheys Handjob and then passed out on the floor.
by USPFCMC September 5, 2023
mugGet the Hersheys Handjobmug.

Danish Handjob

A conventional handjob - though not to completion - wherein the receiver alternates between stroking the shaft and painfully crushing the testicles.
I was in my car with my latest guy-friend the other day, and I totally gave him a Danish Handjob.
by Mr Monotony June 2, 2018
mugGet the Danish Handjobmug.

Devil's Handjob

Forgetting to wipe your hands and touching your dick in the bathroom after eating hot wings.
Did you hear about Frank? Gave himself

a Devil's Handjob after eating wings after the game!!
by CamGuy41 July 27, 2019
mugGet the Devil's Handjobmug.

Santa Handjob

An orgy activity in which several men lay naked next to each other while another person strokes their penises, one stroke at a time, going along the row of men, repeating as necessary until each man has ejaculated. It is named for its similarity in nature to the tale of Santa Claus, who enters homes through their chimneys to deliver presents and then quickly leaves, with the penises representing the chimneys and the hand representing Santa. Can also be done as a competition to see which man can last the longest.
Coworker 1: You gonna show up to the company Christmas party?
Coworker 2: As long as I don't have to witness a Santa Handjob like last year, then sure.
Coworker 1: I doubt that'll happen, that shit got three people fired.
by prismcheeto November 25, 2020
mugGet the Santa Handjobmug.

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