today on things

Expression. Short-hand for "Today on things that happened".

Used when someone is lying, or exaggerating a story. Often used on the internet and seldom in real life.

"Here's a picture of the house I paid off in two years using essential oils!! #BossBabe"

"Today on things"

by GoobyeLikeAOuija July 25, 2021

Today or Tomorrow

Within 2-14 business days.

I have a meeting. I’ll bring it to you today or tomorrow.

by TortillaPlodzien August 24, 2021

Yesterday Today

Used during that awkward timeframe where you've stayed awake past midnight, and thus the "today" in your head is technically yesterday

At 3am

Friend 1: Yesterday today was amazing

Friend 2: Please just say today, I know what you're talking about

by Stella_Star September 19, 2022

Not today female Jim Jones

Letting a female Jim Jones know that she wasn't going to be getting the best of you today.

It wasn't enough to defeat me, not today female Jim Jones.

by The Original Agahnim December 30, 2021

Not today female Jim Jones

Letting a female Jim Jones know the adversity and antagonizing isn't going to be enough to defeat you today.

Not today female Jim Jones, you aren't conquering it and claiming it as your territory today.

by The Original Agahnim December 30, 2021

The walls are white today

A sentence to say you feel anxious, you want to cry snd you want to leave

*people talking*

Someone : “the walls are white today…huh..”

Someone else : “oh…uh yeah they are!”

*leaving*

by Froggyislost January 17, 2022

gosh today

“gosh today” is basically the equivalent to saying “oh my lord”. it’s used as a response for when you are surprised by something but also find it funny at the same time.

Courtney: OMG I MET LIL HUDDY AND HE CANNED ME A MONKEY NIGGER!
Me: SAY WHAAAAT??! GOSH TODAY!

by naia😍 March 15, 2022