go eat a christmas tree

a funny christmas insult

max : bro your so dumb!
leah: go eat a christmas tree!

by haddadoitonem December 18, 2023

Felon's Tree Removal

A colloquial term for an arborist from upstate NY or other back woods place who employs felons, particularly, registered sex offenders.

He first verifies that they are indeed registered sex offenders - or at a minimum convicted felon - and then he gives them unsupervised access to chainsaws and wood chippers. Sometimes accidents happen and there end up fewer felons than they started with, so it's not all bad.

Other times - well, felons with chainsaw... The possibilities are endless, and some aren't so great.

Bro "Brah, where can I get a job? I just I'm on parole, so nobody's gonna hire me."
Brah "Bro, go work for Felon's Tree Removal. They'll hire ya. They literally only hire felons."
Bro "Nah, Bra, they won't let me do anything. I'm a felon."
Bra "The hell they won't! You'll get your own chainsaw, wood chipper, shit, you'll probably get your own shotgun to protect you from choopacobras and parole officers."

by Double take July 10, 2025

Mystical tree

The root where all wisdom is born.

The mystical tree enlightened me about what women really want!

by Sohn von mystical tree September 17, 2023

tree

another word for toilet

let me piss near this tree

by VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV December 20, 2022

Nigga Tree

When a nigga puts little to no effort on their Christmas tree.

Jordan: This tree is fucking ass!
Mark: Well, it's a nigga tree

by zhgiozhol February 16, 2024

tree wedging

When one continuously rubs their vagina or penis against a tree until satisfied.

Martha thinks tree wedging is fun.

by gusbydoodledandy March 21, 2016

The Christmas tree

A sex position where male stands on a handstand and the woman then climbs the man wrapping her legs around his body while proceeds to ride the man’s penis in the handstand position

Baby we can use the Christmas tree position tonight.

by Coco sex enthusiast April 29, 2024