Skip to main content

Crack Wank

Similar to a tit wank but instead the ass cheeks are used, with no petentration involved. Penis is vertical between the crack.
I did all the housework today just so my girlfriend would crack wank me
mugGet the Crack Wankmug.

Angry Wank

Creating your self a brand new fore skin (especially if challenged to a Surprise Space Docking challenge) by wanking really, really fast and hard..... warming up the skin and extending it way beyond the tip hopefull so far it can be placed as a cover over the tip of your opponents penis.
This one time on the Hay Plain I took an angry wank whilst staring at a cupboard. Through the window a horse was looking me right in the eye. He knew.
by Lorraine Haul May 23, 2023
mugGet the Angry Wankmug.

Pokey chokey bum wank

To combine 2 sexual acts for one dose of heightened pleasure a pokey bum wank combined with self asphyxiation by the use of vigorously inserting ones finger in an out of one's own anus whilst furiously pleasuring ones own man truncheon with the other hand and at roughly a minute before the point of unbridled ecstasy lean forward on the pre attached belt (hung from the light fitting before the start of the act) choking one's self out and at the point of the act of cumming releasing the pressure on the belt giving you the pleasure of a good pokey and a good bit of asphyxiation admittedly it is a lot of effort but after a few goes it gets easier to set up ideally a spare bedroom is available so you can just leave the equipment ready and waiting not for the feint of hearted and not recommended to do without letting someone know what you have planned (maybe phone up one of your parents and ask if they could stay on the line to make sure release was in good time if a bit late they can phone the relevant emergency service)
I really enjoy a good pokey chokey bum wank but I love a bit of asphyxiation sex too if only there was a way I could enjoy both at the same time (idea form's) just maybe there is a way it might take some time and effort but just think of the pleasure maybe just maybe it might be worth a bit of experimentation to see what is the worst that can happen
(any attempt to do this is at one's own risk and no amount of expensive no cash up front lawyers can help to sue until a safety bracket can be set up maybe one for some entrepreneurs to try pitch to the dragons den)
mugGet the Pokey chokey bum wankmug.

wank

what you do while reading these
by mmmmmmmmmmmdmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmd December 8, 2024
mugGet the wankmug.

wanking to the poll

to push to the limit, to bring to the very end.
guy 1: holy shit! your doing 60 mph!
guy 2: thats nothing. i havnt even begun wanking to the poll.
by neotreo December 24, 2007
mugGet the wanking to the pollmug.

highest wanking officer

Man with vague military pretensions who goes out of his way (usually in a somewhat obnoxious manner) to make sure you know about it. Served, but only with minimum effort possible in order to claim the bragging rights. Probably never got shot at.
"Ooh, He's a military man. Cool, right?"
"Dude, He was a Chef in the TA for a few months. Bit of a highest wanking officer if you ask me."
by roverdose September 28, 2022
mugGet the highest wanking officermug.

Flag Wanking

Someone whomst is a Member of the British Conservative party who wants everyone to pledge allegiance to the flag of the UK.
Boris Johnson enjoyed **Flag Wanking** in parilament today.
by Oure April 21, 2021
mugGet the Flag Wankingmug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email