When an inexperienced female or male attempts to give a handjob. Much like going straight from first to fifth gear. Handjobs are suppose to go up and down, not back and forth.
"Joe did you hookup with Sara last night?"
"Yeah man Im hurtin' she gave me the worst Stickshift Handy i've ever seen"
"Yeah man Im hurtin' she gave me the worst Stickshift Handy i've ever seen"
by LCopeCope March 2, 2017
Get the Stickshift Handymug. She was crazy, we didn’t have sex but she gave me a Hamburg Handy. I knew manning friends with a German girl would pay off!
by J Sixer February 15, 2020
Get the Hamburg Handymug. by Th517874 July 1, 2019
Get the Sandy Handymug. When a menstruating woman pleasures herself and her dude walks in a catches her and he’s disgusted so to try and make it better she give him a hand job with her bloody hand.
Guy 1: Why is your dick red, I can’t put that in my mouth?
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
by Captain Red Wing June 6, 2018
Get the Red Handymug. A week long, calculated hand job. A hand job 5/5 star rating in real life and on Yelp. A slightly aggressive hand job that ends with the giver exclaiming "Oh Yeah!" and the recipient splooging everywhere.
Jim: "So how was the weekend with the wife?"
Randy: "I'm still recovering. My wife gave me a Handy Savage and now I have to pee sitting down."
Randy: "I'm still recovering. My wife gave me a Handy Savage and now I have to pee sitting down."
by DJ_Smedium_Dick July 29, 2017
Get the Handy Savagemug. Linda Rucker denied the accusation that she had offered Christopher Waterhouse an SPF handy at summer camp.
by eunuchorns and reignboughs August 11, 2014
Get the SPF Handymug. 1. The popular 1940's Educational Film Production Company, 'Jam Handy', who created such classic films as "A Case of Spring Fever"
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
"Nigel, where does one acquire a Jam Handy in this borough?"
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
by Adrian Potato September 26, 2020
Get the jam handymug.