I did a poo

When you go on the toilet for an exciting event

I'll tell you when i did a poo in 363 secods

by I like beans on toast July 24, 2023

...I did something

The noise you hear before your friend is about to tell you that they zip tied their two big toes together.

Phone rings:
Friend 1: Hey what's up, you never call me?

Friend 2: ...I did something

Friend 1: Damn it, not again. Are you at least near scissors this time?

Friend 2: well um... funny story, I was going on a hike in the woods and I found a zip tie in my bag...

Friend 1: so what you're saying is you're in the middle of the woods alone with your big toes zip tied together?

Friend 2: Uhm... yeah pretty much...

Friend 1: (bursts out laughing) Well have fun with that, this is gonna be a fun story to tell my parents (hangs up)

Friend 2: Wait what do you mean tell your parents? Hello? Don't leave me here.

by IDK1234583 July 9, 2024

Did I ask

When someone says basically anything to you, you reply “Did I ask?”

“Yo I got a new car “
“Did I ask”

“I got a 100 on my test”
“Did I ask?”

by Crockss March 8, 2022

Did i ask?

When someone in the group chat (or in general) says something no one asked about in the conversation.

Bill Cosby Group Chat

John:yo tim, you wont believe it something crazy happened at the mall today!

Tim:what happened?

John:I saw THE Bill Cosby in the mall today harrassing a woman!

Tim:YOOO THATS SICK!! Did you take any pictures?

Bob:yo what happened?

John:I Just saw THE Bill Cosby in the mall today!

Bob:Who?

John:What do you mean who? This entire group chat is about bill cosby!

Bob: ASKED!!! Hahaha, haha, haaa...

Tim:Did i ask?

Bob:what?

Tim:For you to stay in this group chat?

Bob was kicked from the group chat.

by Discord Luigi July 28, 2022

Did I ask?

One of the most infuriating things you can say to someone as it instantly shuts down any possible social interaction and makes everyone feel awkward. There is no way to come back from this lazy retort without looking like a jackass. Personally, I recommend you resort to physical violence if this comeback is ever used.

Person 1: I haven't been feeling well, my grandmother just died and I haven't gotten over it yet.
Person 2: Did I ask?
Person 1: Proceeds to beat person 2 to death

by Partydude17 May 23, 2023

did i asked

when a people says something then someone replys with "did i asked" or "did i ask"...

Human 1: i have a dog in my house
Human 2: did i asked
Human 1: no but i dont really care mother fucker

by Makayu February 7, 2022

How in the fuck did I get home just now?

I'm walking home from work just now, and I walk out the door... Step down the hill onto the side walk... And I zone out COMPLETELY. I don't remember walking across the intersection... I don't remember crossing the train tracks... I don't remember turning the corner... I look up and I can already see my apartment.

Hym "How in the fuck did I get home just now? I can usually recall walking past some of the milestones I use to, like, keep track of my progress but this time... What the fuck happened just there? I just skipped like 80% of my walk. I... Are you trying to kill me? I lost like a full 30 minutes just there. I mean, it was 730 when I started writing this... I pooped and showered... Rubbed one out... The walk home only takes 10 minutes... I'm missing like 30 minutes. What the fuck is happening there? Randy didn't show up today... So THAT was weird... What the fuck is happening there? I mean AS SOON as I stepped on the sidewalk it's like I skipped the next 8 minutes forward in time... And then I'm still missing 22 minutes... Hmmm... Are YOU doing that? Time is all fucked today."

by Hym Iam March 9, 2025