Rejection Day

February 13th. February 14th, or Valentine's Day, is of course the perfect day for everyone with a sweetheart. So the day before is basically the day people make a last ditch effort to start scrambling for a rebound or when desperate a butterface but end up getting turned down by the same chicks who believe they deserve better but don't have shit, not fucking shit, not motherfucking shit to offer back. You don't win on Rejection Day.

Kyle: Everyone's talking about how great tomorrow's gonna be because they get to spend it doing romantic stuff like cuddling and watching movies and eating candlelit dinner. Maybe I'll go find a girl so I don't feel left out.

Jake: Dude, you'll end up with some chick that just broke up with another guy or a girl with the best body with a horrible face, besides either way you'll get turned down. You can't win.

Kyle: Just watch me. *goes to a bar and sees some random blonde* Hey, you look gorgeous. Maybe we could hook up?

Random Blonde: I just broke up with some douchebag, I'm not ready for another relationship because I feel like I deserve better than a guy who brought me roses and chocolate while I was in the hospital after surgery, leaving him to pay all the bills and cook dinner.

Kyle: Oh... Right. Take care. *walks away and sees a chick from behind, noting her beautiful body* Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice...*girl turns around, revealing the most inhuman face known to man* ...OH GOD. *temporary blindness from her ugly face*

Butterface Girl: Hi, I'm Stacy. If you're looking for me to be your girlfriend I'm sorry, but no.

Kyle: I'm just gonna go curl up and cry now. *goes back to Jake*

Jake: What did I tell you? You can never win on Rejection Day.

Kyle: *sobs* DAMN YOU, Rejection Day!

by TwoKings March 1, 2014

rejection

What my love life currently consists of

She rejected me, and she did, oh and she did as well

by Rock DJ January 15, 2005

respection

n. An erection formed out of an immense respect for someone or something.

"I got a massive respection watching this Led Zeppelin DVD"

by Jeremy Blacker October 11, 2005

Rerection

The second erection following that first easy one that finished before you even started.

I'm so sorry. This usually doesn't happen... honestly. Hold on, I'll have my rerection any minute.

by HummerND February 16, 2009

Urban Dictionary rejection

That sad moment when you try and add a word to Urban Dictionary and they send you the email saying that the editors decided not to publish it. This lowers your self esteem because it makes you think you're not the funniest mother fucker alive like you thought all your life.

Jake: Hey what's wrong with Johnny?
Blake: He's feeling the Urban Dictionary Rejection.
Jake: I always told him comedy wasn't his thing.

by bloody penguin November 7, 2011

vaginal retention plan

A woman who will still sleep with a guy long after their relationship has ended despite the fact that he has a new girlfriend.

Yeah, I'm dating somebody new but she doesn't put out, so I kept my ex on the Vaginal Retention Plan.

by kyssable1 January 11, 2009

Statue of Reception

when you're sending a text message and you lose the last bar of service and you raise your arm up like the Statue of Liberty in hopes of catching just enough signal to complete the text transaction.

Doug- DUDE! I'm sexting Jessica and I just lost service!
Tom- Put your arm in the air! Hurry!
Fred- Statue of Reception, nice.
Tom- Works every time..

by meetgeorgejetson August 20, 2009