taking my talents to south beach

A euphemism for masturbation, made popular by LeBron James during his "The Decision" (also called the LeBronocalypse) television special.

The NBA is so unbearable I'll be taking my talents to south beach this fall instead of watching any games.

by jcuhomey July 11, 2010

Taking my talents to South Beach

Masturbation. Explanation:

When you realized you're not going to get sex, you go home and masturbate. Likewise, when you realize you really aren't the best basketball player of all time, and you don't like cold cities, you "take your talents to South Beach".

Hey Bob, you get lucky at the club?

Bob: Nope, imma go upstairs. I'll be taking my talents to South Beach.

by T-MLB July 11, 2010

Taking my talents to South Beach

1: Masterbation; self-gratifying sexual act

2: F*ck you Cleveland

Ray: Hey dude you wanna hang out tonight, watch the Cavs?

Chris: No, I'm taking my talents to South Beach, sorry bro

by c1sok1d July 11, 2010

Taking my talents to South Beach

1. Masturbating
2. (lesser known) Deciding to betray one's family and hometown.

Dude, I struck out at the bar, so it looks like I'm going to be taking my talents to South Beach tonight...

by bighoops57 July 10, 2010

Taking my talents to South Beach

A figurative "cleveland steamer" as performed by LeBron James...on Cleveland. The resulting malodorous mess in Cleveland had a record reminiscent of the Washington Generals'.

I'm burning my home and taking my talents to South Beach.

by Haterade! December 11, 2011

Taking my talents to South Beach

The act of sexually pleasing oneself or another. The euphemism is inspired by the quote by Lebron James on his "Decision" special.

Lebron: Mom, what are you and Delonte doing?

Gloria: I'm taking my talents to South Beach.

by ESPNspecial July 10, 2010

taking my talent to south beach

1. (v) Masturbation.

I'll talk to you later, I'm taking my talent to south beach.

by johnnysmith999 July 13, 2010