Cutter's Handjob

The act of cutting one's palm and giving their male partner a hand job, using the blood as lube.

Dude! You know that goth chick we met last night? Well after the party, we went out back, and she totally fucking cut her palm open! Then she grabbed my dick and gave me a good ol' fashion Cutter's Handjob .

by Captain Rummidew June 10, 2010

Canadian Handjob

just the balls

"Brett, did you get some last night?" "Yeah but just a Canadian Handjob"

by Salt18 November 18, 2016

Schrodinger's Handjob

When you tittyfuck a girl who has a flat chest so its not really a "handjob" but its also not really a "Tittyfuck"

man 1 - "Bro i just got a great tittyfuck from my girlfriend"

man 2 - "bro your gf is super flat are you sure it wasn't just a Schrodinger's Handjob"

by Beastman723 April 7, 2017

Hungarian handjob

Simultaneously jerking someone off while repeatedly throat punching them.

Miles mind was blown last night when I gave him a Hungarian handjob. I wish I had known that "megadom magam" meant "I surrender" though. We could have avoided some awkward moments in the ER.

by Az én péniszem a tûz pénisze May 12, 2017

accidental handjob

when you didn't really plan on giving a handjob but you did anyways.

"I just wanted to cuddle with him, but it turned into an accidental handjob."

by kethavele June 3, 2017

Kimchi Handjob

1. When an act of penile masturbation results in the owner of the fleshy appendage feeling "sour" or "spicy" - usually because of mechanically induced hyperkeratosis lesions on the giver (and subsequently on the receiver) of the manual stimulation. This assault on a friendly weapon can result in the penis looking like a plate of kimchi.

2. When one uses Kimchi as lube before doing the five finger knuckle shuffle

1. "Seth went home with that hot chick that works down at the docks and she gave him a kimchi handjob - his monster is raw."

2. "Oh, that mixed smell of fermented napa cabbage, daikon radish, scallions, Korean red pepper powder, fish sauce, fresh ginger, garlic cloves & salted shrimp? Yeah, that's my junk. Last night I got a Kimchi Handjob."

by Dr. Michael Mancini August 30, 2013

ego handjob

<Noun>
An ego handjob is an exchange of unsolicited compliments between friends that is meant to flatter, affirm, or charm; especially under circumstances in which the mutual feelings are generally already known. Ego handjobs should be mutual and reciprocated.

Two people exchanging ego handjobs:
Friend one: "You are awesome!"
Friend two: "YOU are awesomer!"
Friend one: "Your ego handjobs feel great!"
Friend two: "No way... YOUR ego handjobs are just amazing."

by Armchair007 December 25, 2011