Everyone has heard an adult human rectum can stretch to 7 inches without tearing; and that raccoons can fit into holes as small as four inches. The Florida Man, takes advantage of those last few inches of clearance with the addition of an adult brown striped Atlantic octopus. Octopi can fit into anything larger than their beak. So to preform the Florida Man, one must simply trap a dumpster raccoon, catch an adult Atlantic octopus, and then hogtie the raccoon using the Optimus’s tentacles. At that point a fair amount of axle grease should ease the transition into the rectum, potato cannons can also be used for extra Florida points. The two animals will then fight to the death in the recipient’s rectum, without ever tearing the sphincter.
Bets should be placed about which animal will come out the victor.
It is also important not to bitch out and use Atlantic Pygmy octopi as they are venomous.
Bets should be placed about which animal will come out the victor.
It is also important not to bitch out and use Atlantic Pygmy octopi as they are venomous.
Weirdest thing I’ve ever seen come into the ER? We once had a guy come in with a dead raccoon and a live octopus up his ass. Everyone with him apparently had bets going about which animal would be dead when we removed them. They called it the Florida Man Colonsseum
by Jdh1002 April 12, 2023
by Gryffindor406 February 22, 2016
by psuedonymic December 23, 2022
They is good men but like to lie and horn they bulling anybody even there little brother them is hoes
Jock prick specialist
Jock prick specialist
by Urnabja November 23, 2021
dem man is DOG. Dem cyah take up ah damn book and is de most UNLOYAL niggas ever. Dem does hop from gyal to gyal and give demself ah bad name. It rel sad.
by justakidontheinternet February 01, 2023
When you drop something made of glass and the glass shatters, but stays in place. It creates a web-like appearance. This creates a limited edition version of whatever you previously had, known as the Spider-man edition.
I dropped my phone on the sidewalk and the screen shattered. It's not quite broken, it's just Spider-man edition now.
by TuningOnTheRun October 23, 2013
Mostly a racist ass white cop that is in America and likes to pull his strap when a nigga has done nothing. (AKA the guy who killed George Floyd)
Devante: Who is that Mike?
Mike: Nigga shut the fuck up its a American police man he is gonna spread our cheeks is he sees us.
Mike: Nigga shut the fuck up its a American police man he is gonna spread our cheeks is he sees us.
by your_blackie9 February 28, 2024