fuck my ass cause i love jesus

loving jesus so much that you stay a virgin but are so desperate to fuck some1 that you tell them to put it in your ass.

I'm'a christian but i want some fuck so fuck my ass cause i love jesus christ.

by weavesnatcher69 December 3, 2017

bank is closed

When you want to tell someone when you are not in the mood for sex.

I’m sorry Wes but the bank is closed for the weekend you really pissed me off.

by Sweetscorpio May 25, 2018

How to Cause Pain

1. Put your hand at their waist
2. Hold onto the muscle
3. Turn your wrist 360 degrees
4. Don't let go
5. Wait for it
(6. Run for it)

How to Cause Pain:
A: does the 6 steps
B: *screams in agony and start to chase after

by Wifisystemmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm October 24, 2019

closet christians

Athiests who harbor unreasonable resentment towards God. How can they resent something that by definition they don't believe in? Also, put any athiest on their deathbed and they'll be the first to pray for mercy.

"Oh my god, he's shooting at me! Please, God, don't let him kill me! NOOOOOOOO!" (bang bang)

by Myles McOmp March 27, 2004

close your eyes and open your mouth

A fun game boys play with drunk girls.

Maria said, "Every time I get drunk and a boy says close your eyes and open your mouth, I get a big fat cock in the mouth!"

by Buck Wild Nuts June 4, 2016

close the register

a pleading to someone to cease using sarcasm or dry humor. Principly used when the third party fails to understand the joking nature. Originated in episode 3F07 ("Marge Be Not Proud") of The Simpsons, when Jeff Albertson (AKA Comic Book Guy) says to Bart "Seeing as we are unfamiliar with sarcasm, I shall close the register at this point..."

first guy: "...and the other gynocologist says "Fund us? We're lucky she doesn't sue us!"
second guy: "Uhhh, ok."
first guy: "Gynocolgist? Fund us? Fundus?"
second guy: "I don't get it."
third guy: "Oh, Jesus, Pete! Just close the register!"

by Awful Show Keyz September 28, 2006

Closet Case Food-Hoarder

Someone who is obsessed with food and stores it in places where no one will find it, such as laundry baskets, drying machines, ect.

I went to my cousin's house yesterday and was looking for a t-shirt in the laundry basket when I found her stash of cookies, fruit roll-ups, and brownies. Shes such a closet case food-hoarder.

by blahblahwords May 16, 2010