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Raymond’s Theory

Raymond’s theory proposes the idea that in some instances a coincidence is in fact a coincidence but rather the result of subliminal messaging by advanced media intelligence.

The idea is that something provokes thoughts about a topic on a subliminal level. The target is unaware that the initial stimuli triggers a chain reaction of connections that ultimately lead to a final destination which is often what the stimuli is trying to promote.

This theory is often confused with the Bavarian Conundrum theorized by Howard Rein, however that principle is actually an inverse examination of Raymond’s Theory, and Dr. Raymond Cism has criticized the Rein’s thinking stating that it is too rhetorical to be properly thought of as a legitimate theory.
“I just had a crazy coincidence happen.”
Are you sure that wasn’t just the effect of Raymond’s Theory?”
by anonymous September 8, 2025
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Sam’s Theory

3 guys skull fucking a barely legal freshly 18 little blonde boy, shooting ropes of semen in his eye balls, and then each one penetrating his rectum where they release their warm embrace, after which the blonde boy fucks each of them in the rectum and releases his warm embrace, then each of them poop and bounce that ass on his chest so that it splatters all while getting paid $192k
“Did you hear a drummer did that for money?”

“Yeah I heard they’re calling it Sam’s Theory”
“Is that the one where 3 guys skull fucking a barely legal freshly 18 little blonde boy, shooting ropes of semen in his eye balls, and then each one penetrating his rectum where they release their warm embrace, after which the blonde boy fucks each of them in the rectum and releases his warm embrace, then each of them poop and bounce that ass on his chest so that it splatters all while getting paid $192k??”
“Yeah dude I think that’s the one
“Chills dude… Chills”
by boxes507 November 7, 2025
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The M Theory

Potential partners who have a name starting with the letter “M” are likely to to be attractive, funny, and kind. Current science is limited but it’s believed they have an enzyme that is generated in their system that called the builtdifferentezine that allows for this condition to take shape. It’s often suggested one pursues a date of some kind or the contact information of an “M” specimen to further investigate this unusual condition.
Oh his name is Marcelese? Here’s my number, give it to him and tell him I want to grab coffee sometime! I need to test the M Theory
by BLACK-MAN December 24, 2020
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Radical Fluid Identity Theory

... posits that many of the putative unchangeable characteristics, such as race or gender,will become irrefutably protean in the future given we reach the point where it's technologically possible to do things like switch genders or race more easily & or in a (more) irrefutable manner. Supposed unchangeable characteristics would become patently changeable & analogous to the clothes one chooses to wear or the colour of hair one chooses to have.
Jolyne: Methinks Radical Fluid Identity Theory is a good idea. It'll prolly get people in the mindset of wanting to try all the stuffs. All the genders, all the races, all the characteristics, all the life, do everything, shag everything, everybody love everybody bruh.

June: Yo dude it gets me hype. I cannot wait for the future.

Reaves: Yo I remember the future
Celyne: NEKTAR NOW!
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Septum Ring Theory

Septum Ring Theory is a vague insult typically used against people with septum rings on social media platforms like TikTok. There's no concrete definition, but you know it when you see it. Septum Ring Theory is characterized by the following qualities.

• Septum Piercing (Obviously, and other present piercings in a given example strengthens the theory & insult's effect)
• Dyed Hair (Typically bright, attention hungry colors)
• Heavily left-leaning/liberal ideology
• Misandry
• Inflated sense of self importance/ego
• Inability to take accountability
• Tattoos (Not a requirement, but often found alongside the other indicators)

The purpose of the insult is to make the target angry. Responses to being told they fit the definition of septum piercing theory typically revolve around virginity or baselessly insinuating that the person receiving the insult is attractive to the person delivering it (this is the aforementioned inflated sense of self importance/ego showing itself in full.) These people will also lump you into a nebulous group of conservative boogeymen, which is where the political angle comes in despite the comment itself having nothing to do with politics. These replies are exactly what is expected though, and only help to further prove the Septum Ring Theory.

In short, Septum Piercing Theory is a comment that's designed to knock a very specific set of chronically online losers down a peg, and it usually works to great effect, almost like a cheat code.
Person A (with septum piercing): Men don't deserve rights/are trash/should be killed, etc, etc.

Person B (Usually a faceless account in Person A's comment section): Septum Ring Theory still undefeated.

Person A (in a video response to the comment): Spoken from a man who's never had his face in between a woman's legs. (They think they ate with this 🤭)
by The Masterful Baiter September 15, 2025
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Subjective Assignment Theory

The theory that states that any subjective assignment (such as a book review) can be done without knowing what you are talking about (like writing a book review without reading the book).
Person 1: "Did you read the book and write the review?"

Person 2: "Nah. I'm not going to read the book; I'm just going to use Subjective Assignment Theory."
by bodfibodgjioqja November 18, 2011
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Marshall's Theory

The width of an individual female breast defined as the circumference of their arm times by 1.5
Friend: Using Marshall's Theory, those knockers are around 17cm each

Friend 2: Dang bro, How'd you figure?
by ThunderSh0w3r September 17, 2022
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