Sanding alabaster in bed

An excellent handjob.

She's a master, its like she's sanding alabaster in bed and I'm the sculpture.

by MsSaskatchewan February 22, 2013

bed pig

A small to medium sized domestic cat that when sleeping in the bed with its owner takes up 75% or more of the mattress area.

This horizontal chihuahua is a total bed pig.

by James_onthe_Rocks1 January 9, 2018

‘red the bed’

When you have your period and blood leaks onto the sheets in your sleep. It’s like wetting the bed only you have less control of it happening as sometimes your wearing adequate period wear but your period might be so heavy that it leaks onto the sheets anyways.

I forgot to put in tampon last night and I ‘red the bed’.

by Aria-Awards-For-Cats April 26, 2023

I was under the bed

Had a phenomenal sleep
Sleeping good
Knocked out

Hey, sorry I missed your call, I was under the bed lol.

by Letmehelp May 8, 2025

Bed

somewhere you have sex

I went in bed with John and fucked him for 9 hours straight

by Lumiar November 12, 2023

Bed Sniffer

Australian slang; An investigator from a welfare agency, who comes to your house to test your eligibility and question weather or not you are having sexual relations with your housemates. (As income could be less for people in a defacto relationship, than that of people simply co-residing.

Had to set up a second bed in the spare room today, because the bed sniffers are coming to investigate.

by 3BG October 4, 2019

Go Home, Go Bed

An extremely long VanossGaming skit where Tyler tries to...get home and go to bed. But he ends up in several other places, including a strip club, a random street with a goomba (goomba, fuck you!), Hogwarts, Minecraft, the Moon itself, and many other places -- all while being completely ignorant as to where he is because he is player model is looking up while Vanoss tries his absolute hardest to keep it together.

I'm sick and tired of playing this stupid fucking game.

I just wanna go home, go bed.

by Ubeenbamboozledson December 9, 2021