A generally low ranking member of the Unorganized Militia. These are generally the most disposable members of a revolution, that exist to die protecting Liberty and overthrowing tyranny. True Goons are well trained and have the "Speak Softly, but carry a big stick" mentality. They are lovers of people and defenders of freedom. Goons have no racial, Gender, religious, orientation, or Socioeconomic criteria to join. They are an all inclusive group and welcome anyone (besides tyrants and pedophiles).
The Goons are down at the Public library, wearing plate carriers with their rifles, to keep the mayor from burning the books that cover the terrible things the Nazi's did.
by George Washington's Ghost October 1, 2021
Get the Goonmug. A family made up of two divorced parents, an arrested uncle, an annoying daughter, an estranged son, a depressed gay cousin, a weird grandmother, and a Yorkshire terrier. The parents despise each other and only stay together for the sake of their family. The uncle is currently in jail for harassing children and is not allowed anywhere near a school. The daughter is just annoying, and the son spends most of his time alone in his bedroom edging. The depressed gay cousin's parents died in a house fire so she now lives with the Goon family. The grandmother visits once every 50 years and says nothing. The dog is the glue of the Goon family, she is what keeps them together and a somewhat happy family. Their favorite family activity is gooning on the audience at shows.
"The Goon family was gooning all over the audience!".
"The Goon family is very dysfunctional and rambunctious".
"The Goon family is very dysfunctional and rambunctious".
by Maraudersequallife February 15, 2025
Get the Goon Familymug. An extremely difficult style of flicker gooning, only ever been performed by the great Cleetus Ibuprofen, who decided that Japanese kamikaze flicker gooning wasn't enough for him. To execute this technique, you must produce 2 and a half home depot buckets of dihh cheese, reverse time itself to de-age your dihh cheese back into milk, creating a cow magnet which magnetizes every cow in a 69 mile radius to atatch to your dihh. Now, you must touch 3 pressure points on each of the cows asshole, forcing them to shit all over your dihh. Now all thats left is to do a regular flicker gooning technique, which will shoot a milk-semen mixture everywhere, which Cleetus nick named "Cummilk", causing a tsunami. This technique is extremely dangerous and should never be performed under any circumstance, unless you are Cleetus himself
Do you remember when Cleetus flooded the city with semen because of the Cow Manure Flicker-Gooning technique?
by Cablito August 31, 2025
Get the Cow Manure Flicker-Gooningmug. A variation of regular flicker gooning (masturbating or "gooning" while repeatedly flicking the tip of the penis at a quick pace to achieve farther ejaculation), said to have been created by the Aztecs around 1300.
The Aztec flicker gooning technique was so effective that cumshots could reach distances of 100 to 500 meters. Some Aztecs, who specialized in this technique, could reportedly shoot as far as 1000 meters.
Not only was it capable of extreme range, but it also provided a level of pleasure unmatched by any other form of masturbation.
According to legend, Aztec warriors used this technique as a weapon, with their semen traveling at such speed and distance that it could heavily wound enemies upon impact.
Some believe that flicker gooning played a role in Aztec rituals, to summon or bring sacrifices to the gods of gooning and edging. Though there are not enough sources to confirm this for certain.
Unfortunately, after the European conquest of the Aztec Empire in 1521, all knowledge of how to perform the Aztec flicker gooning technique was lost.
The Aztec flicker gooning technique was so effective that cumshots could reach distances of 100 to 500 meters. Some Aztecs, who specialized in this technique, could reportedly shoot as far as 1000 meters.
Not only was it capable of extreme range, but it also provided a level of pleasure unmatched by any other form of masturbation.
According to legend, Aztec warriors used this technique as a weapon, with their semen traveling at such speed and distance that it could heavily wound enemies upon impact.
Some believe that flicker gooning played a role in Aztec rituals, to summon or bring sacrifices to the gods of gooning and edging. Though there are not enough sources to confirm this for certain.
Unfortunately, after the European conquest of the Aztec Empire in 1521, all knowledge of how to perform the Aztec flicker gooning technique was lost.
"We learned about the Aztec Empire in history class today. Their gooning technique was wild. I wish I could learn the Aztec flicker gooning technique and shoot my load 500 meters!"
by Sir. Glizzy III November 15, 2024
Get the Aztec flicker gooningmug. The act of inserting rock into the foreskin then surrounding the penis in rocks and rubbing the rocks on your penis in a up and down motion.
by currypowder42 January 27, 2025
Get the Indian rock gooningmug. Excessive and intensive masturbation. Typically done so for weeks on end, using methodology regarding "edging." People "goon" on a frequent or habitual basis may be referred to as "gooners," but not necessarily ubiquitously, as one may partake in gooning without a gooner lifestyle.
"Bro I'm so fucking sick of this game. GOON BREAK."
Look at that chick's armpits. I'm about to goon my shit off right now."
Friend 1: "Why do you only play genshin impact in short bursts of time?"
Friend 2: "I can't stop gooning when I see the characters."
Look at that chick's armpits. I'm about to goon my shit off right now."
Friend 1: "Why do you only play genshin impact in short bursts of time?"
Friend 2: "I can't stop gooning when I see the characters."
by da wong mang July 24, 2023
Get the gooningmug. You: "Yo bro, did you see that thumbnail of the half naked girl on Youtube?"
Friend: "Yeah bro that was a total goon trigger."
Friend: "Yeah bro that was a total goon trigger."
by dointricksonit April 1, 2025
Get the Goon Triggermug.