Simpson University

Simpson University is a private Christian University located in Redding. The university is currently under academic probation as its leadership could not get their shit together in enough time before the accreditors came knocking. Simpson would be better defined by precisely what it is not, it is not academically rigorous, it is not welcoming to diversity, it does not respond well to new ideas, and it is abhorrent to to what a university should be.

Andrew: "Where are you going to school?"
Jessica: "Simpson University."
Andrew: "Isn't that the school where a few of the Biology professors teach creationism?"
Jessica: "Yeah I don't believe in science my parents told me its lie invented by the Jews and Homosexuals.

by SUAdmissionsTeam October 20, 2017

Squidward University

An Ivy Leauge school specializing in the study of Pooptolgy

"Wow, I finally got my degree from Squidward University! I can finally study Mao Zedongs poop!" - Zachareigh

by Nardothepig February 24, 2020

Milk the Universe

An existential phrase used to describe the feeling of grabbing the universe by the supple teets and chugging down that cosmic milk.

Similar to "Grabbing the Bull by the Horns"

"Quit your job man, go ahead, Milk the Universe"

"Dude, Jenny's down to tongue wrestle. Go get her dog. Milk the Universe"

by yellowshnow May 16, 2019

doane university

The location that one gets doaned. Formerly known as Doane college.

let’s go to Doane University and get doaned.

by Doane1872 December 9, 2017

Universally Sexy

to be attractive to Man, Women, Beast......all walks of life

That girl must be Universally sexy, did you see that lizard check her out!

by ssssdd April 26, 2017

Captain Universe

A caped crusader known for various tactics of defeating crime, including riding on top of cars (also known as Urban Surfing), and kerb-crawling next to suspicious cyclists. Driving at low speed, the Captain reaches out of his car and produces a playmobil telephone to offer to the cyclist, claiming "It's for you-hooooo!"
If said cyclist answers the phone, or rejects it, the captain will identify their criminality, and speed off into the distance, singing "Caaaaaaaaptain Uuuuuuuuniiiiveeeeeeeeeerssssseee!!!"

This term can be used as a noun to describe the superhero, or as a verb to describe his actions of crime-fighting.

Did you see Captain Universe on Oxford Hight Street last night? He was mental! He nearly Captain Universe'd three cyclists in one go!

by Monty S-B November 26, 2010

Gyu University

Gap Year University. Typically meaning a one year gap between graduation of high school and going to college.

Person 1: Hey, it’s so crazy we’re graduating! What college/university are you going to?
Person 2: I know right? I’m actually dedicated to GYU University.

by cait0424 May 4, 2021