We heard Santa exclaim as he flew out sight, “I left my gloves at the damn strip club last Friday night,” but Daniel the elf came tip toeing by and brought Santa a pair of his blue ones to try (blue gloved santa).
by DJTruth December 10, 2022
Get the Blue Gloved Santa mug.A guy who flies around on Christmas Eve and gives gifts to children. If he wasn't magic, he would have had a heart attack by now.
Might be a pedophile. I don't think so.
Might be a pedophile. I don't think so.
by Donutapplesauce December 21, 2022
Get the Santa mug.Santa the nonce
by HazzaGazza08 December 24, 2022
Get the Santa mug.Santa is a non-existing man. The legend of Santa Claus can be traced back hundreds of years to a monk named St. Nicholas. It is believed that Nicholas was born sometime around A.D. 280 in Patara, near Myra in modern-day Turkey. Much admired for his piety and kindness, St. Nicholas became the subject of many legends. Santa usually wears red and green clothes. Most parents tell their childeren that Santa will come down their chimney at night on Christmas Eve ( 24th December ). It is really just their parents putting presents underneath their Christmas tree. Childeren might stop believing in him around the age of 8-10.
by Angxlii December 24, 2022
Get the Santa mug.The yearning experienced by converts to Messianic Judaism during Catholic holidays in general, but more specifically, that during Christmas, while experiencing bum out at the traditional hybridized figure of Santa Claus, who bears attire traditionally worn more so by the Babylonian child-sacrifice high priest, Tammuz, during his traditional dying of eggs in baby blood with his mother Easter on Tammuz's birthday, December 25th.
It sure seems ironic that we have to explain each year in such detail that Sukkot means YeHoVaH's feast of tabernacles, when the Messiah was *actually* born, and that YeHoVaH specified His feasts as being for every generation of His people. Nobody ever really has a clue they are celebrating child abuse in its purest form at all these Easter egg hunts and Christmas parties. And then, on top of it, we even have to explain how YeHoVaH said not to be serving him according to foreign religious traditions. It's like people are referencing a deity they don't even really have a clue about when they say Christmas is a biblical holiday. I'm just Santa-Suck-It! Sukkot Jonesin'.
by pardonnez-moi de trébucher December 24, 2022
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A difficult and disturbing sexual act performed on the night of a first date. This is a variation of the Original Dirty Meyers, with the addition of your side hustle being Santa clause. This maneuver requires several conditions to be present in order to pull it off legitimately. First condition, you must not know this girl for more than 24 hours. Second, she must have given birth to at least one child... the more children, the more dirty the myers. Thirdly, you must be willing to bypass the puss and dive straight into an intense asshole munching session. If you so much as know where this girl has been, know that she has no kids or even dabble in the puss while performing oral... you have failed in dirty myering her. It takes a rare breed to drive right into an asshole you know nothing about on the first date, and especially with your mouth wide open. Get it son!!!
by Bendy D January 12, 2023
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