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The Santa Clauses

The clauses which detail Kris Kringle under the North Pole Act of 1436.
Clause 1, Subsection A states that: Saint Nicholas must manufacture a wide variety of games, tools, and miscellaneous objects for children under the age of 12 in all countries of the world.
Clause 1, Subsection B states that: Saint Nicholas must do so for eternity, without pay, and must aquire the following traits: Obesity, A long white beard, a red suit, a fondness for burnt cookies and warm milk.
Evil Little Boy: "Where are my presents?"
Mom: "You were naughty this year, so Santa didn't bring you any."
Evil Little Boy: "Na-uh! According to Clause 1, Subsection A and B, of the Santa Clauses, Santa is required to bring me my demanded presents!"
by Assasinof6 March 11, 2010
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cleanin out my closet

The one of the best Eminem songs of all time.
Dude 1: I never listen to Eminem
Dude 2: Not even Cleanin Out My Closet?
by FunRunner May 17, 2018
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Related Words

Clausemopolitan

Favorite cocktail of the Founding Fathers as they drafted the various clauses of the United States Constitution. Made with crushed elderberry and vodka. See also: The Washingtini.
"I'll drink to the new republic," said Benjamin Franklin as he slaked his thirst with a Clausemopolitan.
by Ae5Ea8 February 2, 2015
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closer

an awesoem song by nine inch nails that could be used as a pick up line
bob- "I wanna fuck you like an animal"

renee-"ok lets go"
by ashley rose July 19, 2005
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Closet Britneyfan

One who bashes Britney Spears in public, in front of friends, on the internet (like urbandictionary.com- seriously, is it necessary to throw around words like "slut" and type with horrible grammer about her? Just makin' yourselves look bad, that's all I'm saying...), etc. but secretly like her music and/or follow her every exploit like a Tigerbeat teen girl.

I'd wager about 80% of Britney bashers secretly like her, and I know MANY of them. For as many people claim to hate her, suddenly it's weird when you look in their room and they have a few of her CDs (who later SWEAR it's their little sister's...sure). Also funny how she keeps hitting #1 all over the world when people continually say she's a fad and hate her...obviously there's quite a few who don't!
Yeah, so get this, Marsha was talking the other day about how much Britney Spears is a slut and she hates her, blah blah blah, but then we went driving around and "Toxic" was on like 3 of her burned CDs we were listening to.

I know! She is such a Closet Britneyfan.
by Bri C August 25, 2005
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really close friend

going out...aka Love...aka couples...aka...love
yah..she is just my really close friend..im with her all the time...JUST A REALLY CLOSE FRIEND
by SAMAAAAArrasras June 17, 2008
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closely held

(BUSINESS) a closely-held corporation has all or most of its stock owned by the management of the firm. In many cases, it has no stock at all (see "going public"), in which case it is a private company.

Usually people say "private corporation" to mean any company that is unaffiliated with the government, or any company run mainly for profit. It's impossible to buck this trend, so corporations with no issues of stock, or negligible amounts of stock held by the public, are called "private companies" despite the fact that not all companies are corporations. Cargill, Inc., for example, has annual revenues of $117 billion, but no shares available for trade. On the other hand, PricewaterhouseCoopers and Ernst & Young are private companies but not a corporations. They are limited liability partnerships. The term "closely held" would not apply to them since partnerships do not issue stock.
Koch Industries is a super-sized, closely held corporation with two owners--Charles and David Koch, heirs to the oil refiner Fred Koch. Thanks to this peculiar status, magazines like Forbes are not allowed to report ANY financial statistics of the company at all (sales figures are suspiciously rounded to "$100,000,000,000.00").

Publix Super Markets (at the other end of the spectrum) is closely held--by its 125,000 employees.
by Abu Yahya September 3, 2010
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