Blue Tuba

When the over excitable seaman preforms oral sex on the rest of the crew when they cross over the tropic of Capricorn or cancer while hiding in the dorade vents of a ship.

Hurry up! Davey from the Navy is manning the BLUE TUBA on the overnight watch tonight. You want to get in line early before the Boston Lockjaw gets tired and stops clenching.

by reddevil12553 June 27, 2023

rusty tuba

Much like a rusty trumpet, only with a much larger partner.

Yeah, your mom had a great time when I gave her the rusty tuba.

by Rhymes With Sock May 10, 2005

contrabass tuba

A tuba designed for marching that resembles a concert tuba in shape but is carried on the left shoulder. They usually weigh between 35 and 55 pounds.

The visual advantage for such a tuba on the field is that it can be held in carry (held vertically in front of the person) and in various other positions.

They are called Contras for short.

See the pic above.

Contras are the most badass instruments ever.

by corpsfreak April 26, 2005

Wagner Tuba

A fucked-up musical instrument most frequently heard in the works of Richard Wagner and Anton Bruckner. Though capable of sounding quite beautiful, it usually sounds like shit and elicits dirty looks and sighs from the rest of the orchestra.

Musician #1: "What are we playing on tour in March?"

Musician #2: "Bruckner 8"

Musician #1: "Oh Fuck! Wagner Tubas!!!"

by hrnhtr February 10, 2009

sex tuba

A threesome. of one boy and two girls.
One hole to bow in, one to play in, and a stick.

"Did you hear that Johnny plays the sex tuba in band."
"Mann, I'm going to join that class."

by Fezz K. October 10, 2009

tuba slurp

When you take a shit into a funnel that runs into a girls mouth, which she then proceeds to puke the poop into the entrance of a tuba. You then play the tuba so that the liquids squirt out into the girls mouth. She then swallows the mixture and eventually shits it out into a bucket, where you then make her cum and squirt into the bucket. You piss into the bucket and pour it into a water gun. You go to a cemetery, dig up a body from a grave, and let it dry in the sun for 24 hours. You go back to the body and shoot the liquids into their urethra. You then piss into the dead bodies mouth and force water down their throat, preferably about a gallon. You wait for the liquids to proceed into the bladder. Next, you fill the vagina of the dead body with shit and cum. You tip the body upside down for 10 seconds, and then you lay it down. You put your mouth over the urethra, and the girl puts her mouth over the vagina; if there is not enough room, just have one person put their mouth over both parts. Take two anvils and have two friends drop them directly on the stomach and bladder. The contents of the carcus will project into you and the girls mouths, giving you an instant, pleasurable taste. You have completed the tuba slurp.

Me and my girlfriend just performed a tuba slurp, it was so fun!

by faglord69xdxd April 10, 2019

Whitewash Tuba

When a male ejaculates into the mouth of an obese female with enough force to cause her to expel flatus.

Dude 1:Dude, have you ever smelled fart and cum at the same time?
Dude 2: Yeah, one time I gave this girl a Whitewash Tuba.

by Mr. Man of Sri Lanka October 6, 2012