Golden Retriever

A partner who knows how to not further damage you.

"I don't need a therapist, I'm dating a golden retriever."1

by Veebop December 6, 2022

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crash retrieval

In ufology, "crash retrieval" is the ongoing, covert practice by military and intelligence agencies of locating crashed UFOs and hauling them back to the nearest secret military warehouse for future scientific study. It is alleged that crash retrievals have been taking place since at least 1947 when the Roswell Incident happened. It is also alleged that the sheer number of successful crash retrievals has been high enough and frequent enough that entire teams have been designated exclusively for the task, and that they are each assigned different geographic regions to carry out their duties.

The goal with crash retrieval is to study the alien technology and the "exotic materials" of the craft, reverse engineer as much of it as possible, and then develop as many military and commercial applications as possible. It has been claimed by UFO insiders that there is a time frame of roughly 20 years from the moment a craft is retrieved, to the marketplace introduction of new tech from the craft. During that 20 years, secret patents get issued to the private contractors whose scientists are studying the exotic materials of the UFO.

Examples of modern technical breakthroughs which are supposedly the end-product of crash retrieval research include transistors, semiconductors, microchips, photovoltaic solar panels, night vision, heat vision, stealth technology, nano-technology, and most of the US space program.

After the UFO was shot down by a fighter pilot, a crash retrieval team from the US Army arrived at the crash site, cordoned off the area, and then hauled the craft lifeless away.

by Innocent Byproduct June 5, 2023

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