Football

Football is a sport (no sh!t Sherlock)

It’s the best and most entertaining sport EVER
and the best player in football is Lionel Messi

Guy 1: hey wanna play football?
Guy 2: sure
Guy 1: 🏈

Guy2: THIS ISNT FOOTBALL LAD THIS IS ⚽️ B!TCH

by alexdevries January 5, 2022

Dirty football

When someone shits on there fingers and rubs it under there eyes to look like Patrick Mahomes and then throws a 80 yarder down field

I just crushed Tom by doing a dirty football

by Alt_F_4 September 7, 2021

Football

A sport. Also a uk word for American soccer.

My brother Kloe plays football (american soccer).

by thecharacterwannie July 1, 2022

This boy doesn't know shit about football mate

When a stupid guy/girl doesn't know anything about football

Isaac-"CR7 is the GOAT of football"
Smart guy-"This boy doesn't know shit about football mate"

by Abdi Carlos April 12, 2018

Mountain Football

A fart contest. Rules vary from region to region, but the goal is to outfart your opponent(s). Best played in groups, so everyone can vote on various fart attributes such as tone quality, attack, release, aromatic quality, and whether it sounds like a particular animal or vocalization. Dutch-ovening your opponents is an automatic disqualification; crop-dusting is encouraged for extra entertainment.

Vic: Those baked beans were delicious, babe.
Sue: Yep, they sure were. Hope you're limbered up and ready for some Mountain Football tonight.
Vic: *frrrrrp??*
Sue: AHAHAHAAAA, you're ahead of me! That one went up at the end and sounded kind of like a question. I award six points and the extra conversion point for style.

by YuliaTheWitch June 4, 2024

Football

A game where grown men fight over a ball

I’m gonna go watch football

by anonymous November 7, 2022

American football

A game that has nothing to do with football.

American football is stupid just call it soccer, and call football football, football. If we actually could be bothered to do this, WW3 might never happen.

by The Funny Skibidi Froog Man December 14, 2023